Rever

Emergency Review of Poems Underway!

2008-03-12T22:07:00.004-04:00

According to the Toronto Star,

"a private Jewish school is reviewing samples of sexual and at times violent poetry written by its director – and posted on his website – after some parents complained the content is inappropriate for an educator."

Judging by the two excerpts posted online by The Star, his poetry is not particularly good, but I don't feel that it's bad enough to warrant a full review.

But since a review is what's been called for, I feel qualified to do so as I've been known to publish a line or two of verse on these pages myself.

Here are my thoughts and recommendations.

Dear Mr. Prashker,

Upon reviewing your poems, I feel you have stumbled upon some compelling imagery - and made some elementary mistakes.

The first poem, "For Agapé" relies too much on adjectives such as ironically, ardently, ineptly.

Tip 1: Show, don't tell Mr. Prashker.

For example, "fumbling with your bra" is a much better way to communicate "ardently if ineptly" than "ardently if ineptly" is. Of course fumbling with a bra could be seen as a cliché, but then, it's also familiar to a lot of people. Either way, you'll probably want to think up something yourself, since you're the one who has to decide whether it expresses what you want it to express.

Tip 2: Always consider cutting the last line of your poem.

Poets are often tempted to use the last line of the poem to summarize exactly what you meant. This removes the subtlety of what your saying and creates a kind of "ta-da" moment that readers are probably not as impressed with as you are. For example:

"F - - - the middle class" you said

"I am," I answered "I am."

But you were too preoccupied to hear

The second poem, "A Song of Self-overcoming" seems not so much a poem as a fragment. I think the idea needs further development. It has no clear sense of purpose or voice. So,

Tip 3: Poeple don't want to read grand pronouncements about human nature.

If they did, they'd go visit their aunts and uncles more often. If you want to write a poem about the time your uncle compared building a deck to the Bible's creation story, that's fine and it might end up being a very good poem. But you can't just write down whatever you want and call it a poem.

Consider the question of who is the speaker in the poem? Who are they talking to? What is the context?

Right now it sounds like your speaker is you (which could be why you're in so much trouble!) This poem certainly expresses your opinion about human nature and the state of the world - but isn't this the job of politicians? And if you're going to be a poet, you're going to need a bit more credibility than that lot.

Conclusion: I believe that you made a good start with these two pieces. As always, my advice is threefold: revision, revision, revision. I don't see anything here that warrants dismissal, particularly since you are not being paid to write poetry.

In solidarity,
DA

Referendum Day!

2007-10-10T08:00:00.000-04:00

Wednesday October 10th is Referendum Day in Ontario, so get out and vote! But first, perhaps you've found yourself wondering about the citizen-endorsed Mixed Member Proportional election system that everyone is talking about.

What are Party Lists?

A Party List is each party's publicly available list of ranked candidates for the election. When a party wins a larger share of the vote than the number of the 90 local seats they win, members of their Party List are elected into the Legislature. Voters will be able to research each party's list before the election takes place and it would seem to me that individuals on the Party Lists would be placed under a lot of public scrutiny. The method each party uses to choose its list must also be made public.

Who's on the Party Lists? Will I be able to find out about them in advance?

Each Party's List will be published before the election along with the method which was used to select them. A Party List that's full of outstanding individuals will attract public support for that party. In other regions where this system is used, party lists usually follow gender parity and include greater diversity with respect to age, ethnicity and other demographic variables (this would an improvement over our current voting system - under FPTP 75 - 80% of our elected representatives are men!).

Doesn't this create a two-tiered legislature? Are their any advantages to having 39 List MPPs?

While Party List candidates don't have a local political constituency to serve, they are competing with the members of other parties lists for support and members of their own party for a good spot on the Party List - so it's in their interest to serve the people as best they can. While these List members wouldn't do constituency work, they also wouldn't receive funding for a consituency office or constituency staff. These representatives will also be able to take a broader view on big issues,and are able to consider how each decision will affect the whole province, rather than one particular riding.

What if a party stacks their party list with political cronies?

My advice - don't vote for a party that stacks their list with political cronies.
By the way, all the party hacks I could find are supporting the No Campaign.

When's the election?

Wednesday, October 10th, 2007

What can I do?

Educate yourself - read the other point of view.Talk to everyone you know about the referendum. In order for democracy to function, people need to know what's at stake!

About the October 10th referendum on MMP

2007-09-28T08:31:00.001-04:00

On October 10th, voters in Ontario will make history by voting in our first referendum since we repealed prohibition. The question is simple: Should Ontario adopt a new method of electing Members of Provincial Parliament or stick with the current system?

The alternative voting method is a form of proportional representation called the Mixed-Member Proportional system. The system was proposed by the Ontario Citizens Assembly on Electoral Reform - a group of ordinary Ontario citizens who were selected to study the question of whether our current method of electing representatives in Ontario should be changed, and if so, to propose an alternative.

Let me get this out of the way: I will be voting in favour of the MMP - the new system proposed by the citizens assembly.

Here are some of the problems with our current system of electing provincial and federal representatives (referred to as a First Past the Post):

1. First Past the Post wastes dissenting votes. FPTP is a winner-take-all system - and winner-take-all makes losers of most. In the current system your vote is only effective if you vote for the winning candidate. While we count dissenting votes, they are not reflected in the make-up of the legislature. That is to say, when youvote for a losing candidate, your vote is effectively wasted - it hasno affect on which party forms the government or how many seats each party receives in the legislature.

In a system where most candidates win election in their riding with less than 50% of the vote, many voters remain unrepresented. Under the current system, voting for a party thatis unpopular in your riding will have no impact - isn't it time that we started counting these votes?

2. First Past the Post over represents populist regional parties like the Reform Party and the Bloc Quebecois and underrepresents parties with more diffuse national support (like theGreen Party and the NDP). For example, in the last federal election,the Bloc Quebecois won 1,553,201 votes and was rewarded with 51 seats in parliament. Meanwhile, the NDP won 2,589,597 votes and won only 29 seats. It took just over 30,000 votes elect a Bloc MP and almost 90,000 votes to elect one NDP member. One might think that the Green Party, which amassed over 600,000 votes would deserve at least 6 seats, but under our First Past the Post system,they didn't win any seats. 600,000 people were entitled to exactly no representation of the party of their choice in Ottawa.

The First Past the Post voting system works best in a two-party system - that's what it was designed for. And it was designed at a time when every candidate for election was white and male and British. Canadians have evolved beyond just two parties - when will we move past First Past the Post?

3. First Past the Post rewards 40% support with absolute power. We know the axium "absolute power corrupts absolutely" - so why do we keep giving absolute power to parties that didn't even earn a majority of our votes? The last time a government in Ontario won over 50% of the popular vote was in the 1930s. Recently, Bob Rae's NDP in 1990 won 37.6% and took 74 of 130 seats in the Legislature - a clear majority ofseats. In 1995, Mike Harris took 44.8% of votes and was rewarded with 82 of 130 seats - giving him absolute power. Dalton McGuinty's Liberals won 46.4%in the last election and took 72 of 103 seats... you get the idea. Ineach case, a party for which most people didn't vote was given free reign to spend, slash or break their promises as they saw fit. Isn't there a better way?

To be continued...

Perhaps you've seen me on Supreme Master Television

2007-09-20T22:52:00.000-04:00

You can see me talk about the Toronto Vegetarian Association and our Annual Vegetarian Food Fair about one third of the way through this video (and then it goes on after a brief message)...

Click here

Red Rover! Red Rover! We call Stephane over!

2007-09-20T22:30:00.001-04:00

Sometimes calling by-elections is like playing Red Rover.

When Stephen Harper called the three Quebec by-elections that took place earlier this week, there were additional vacancies in four other electoral districts. That is to say, Stephen Harper could have called four more by-elections at the same time (he must do so within 6 months of these four seats falling vacant).

Two of the other vacancies were in Toronto, where the Liberals plan to run star candidates Martha Hall Findley and Bob Rae in two safe Liberal ridings. The other two are Vancouver Quadra BC - another solid Liberal district - and Desnethé—Missinippi—Churchill River - a riding which has been held by each of the three major parties in the past ten years.

Stephen Harper's gamble was simple - call the Quebec by-elections and call Stephane Dion over to face long odds in Saint-Hyacinthe—Bagot and Roberval—Lac-Saint-Jean and an NDP dream candidate in the generally Liberal riding of Outremont.

In the rural areas, Dion's Liberals barely made an impact. In the third, NDP star Thomas Mulcair broke through Liberal ranks - ranks that are still working out whether or not they can trust each other to hold tight through the electoral challenges ahead.

Meanwhile, Harper's Conservative candidate for Roberval—Lac-Saint-Jean found it easy to break through a soft spot in Bloc Quebecois support, and Duceppe struggled past intensified Conservative opposition in Saint-Hyacinthe—Bagot.

Dion's big mistake in all this was not drawing attention to the other by-elections which Harper is putting off. Instead of running full-steam towards Outremont, perhaps the right move would have been to call Harper's bluff, smirk for the cameras and say "if you're so tough, why don't you call over my dream team?"

In politics appearance is everything. And in Red Rover, there's nothing more satisfying than when your side makes an unexpected breakthrough. Except perhaps the satisfaction of watching your opponent struggle against the unbreakable bonds of well-prepared comrades in arms.

Ontario's Liberal Government - making Ontario slightly less difficult...

2007-09-05T21:36:00.001-04:00

This election ad by the Liberal Party of Ontario seems to indicate that Liberals will run on their record - making things slightly less difficult for people than they were four years ago when the Black cats still roamed the halls of power (yes, I am invoking Mouseland).

The election will be held on October 10th. I'm voting for the NDP.

technorati tags:election, ontario, campaign, ndp, mouseland, liberal

Equal and Opposite

2007-05-16T09:44:00.001-04:00

Someone smarter than me once said that to every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

Rubber Baron

2007-05-15T10:57:00.001-04:00

The great thing about Michael Ignatieff isn't just the irony.

A couple weeks ago, the Liberal Party deputy leader stepped to the plate to attack the Harper government for handing over detainees captured by the Canadian military in Afghanistan to the authroities there who, wait for it, are alleged to have beaten, starved, whipped and frozen after being deposited with Afghan security forces.

But wait, here's the rebuttal from the Conservative Party website, quoting some Harvard-educated academic named Michael Ignatieff.

“To defeat evil, we may have to traffic in evils: indefinite detention of suspects, coercive interrogations, targeted assassinations, even pre-emptive war.” (Edmonton Journal, May 9, 2004)

Good one. (I believe Stephen Harper also used this in Question Period)

Meanwhile, The Star's Linda Diebel has written a book. It's called Stéphane Dion: Against the Current. Anyhow, a section appeared this weekend (Toronto Star, May 12, 2007) which reported that Ignatieff turned down the position of Liberal Party policy chair for the more, let's say, opportune chance to sit in Question Period as the deputy leader.

According to Diebel, "Scuttlebutt grew that Ignatieff was using the deputy leader's position to build his own empire and steal Dion's job." (It's a great article, and I'm choosing to go with this hypothesis, although you should probably read it yourself if these kinds of things interest you.)

Cast in this light, it looks like Ignatieff is using the deputy leader position to bury some of his old, less popular positions so that when the time comes, he's more palatable to voters.

It seems that Ignatieff is hoping that he's made of rubber, not glue.

Today he takes Gilles Duceppe to task for "opportunism."

"I took part in a leadership contest that lasted eight months. He took part in a leadership contest that lasted 24 hours," said Liberal deputy leader Michael Ignatieff (Etobicoke Lakeshore).

He refused to acknowledge any nobility in Duceppe's admission of error. Instead, Ignatieff said he saw political "opportunism."

"You go into these things and you should go in with both feet and fight through to the end, and he didn't," he said. (Toronto Star, May 15, 2007)

Another classy attack by the Liberal Party's very own Rubber Baron.

News from the Toronto Vegetarian Association

2007-05-14T15:26:00.000-04:00

Summer Jobs with the Toronto Vegetarian Association

The Toronto Vegetarian Association is currently hiring for three summer student positions. We are looking for a Festival & Directory Assistant, a Research Assistant and a Community Outreach Assistant.

Applicants must be vegetarian and meet Canada Summer Jobs program requirements. For more details, please visit Veg.ca - Jobs.

Tofu Haiku contest in it's last week

There's just one week left until the close of the Tofu Haiku poetry contest. Visit tofuhaiku.com for more details.

I'm a Development Coordinator

For those of you who aren't reading my blog for the press release-style promotion of projects that I'm involved in, and instead want to know what's going on in my life, I recently got a promotion to become TVA's Development Coordinator. It's a sweet gig; I've really enjoyed working with TVA so far and I'm loving life in Toronto.

Any questions?

Mixed Member Proportional is a better way

2007-05-10T08:39:00.000-04:00

1. With MMP, every vote counts. Under MMP each voter has the opportunity to select the party and the local candidate of their choice. 90 members would be elected the same way they are now - using first past the post to represent local ridings. An additional 29 seats are allocated to even out the discrepency between the percentage of the vote each party receives and their proportion of seats in the legislature.

For example, if the Green Party failed to win any local ridings, they would receive a number of the 29 extra seats such that that the percentage of seats they have in the legislature equals the percentage of the votes they've received. Parties which would typically be overrepresented under First Past the Post would receive fewer or possibly none of the extra 29 seats. In this way, every vote affects the outcome of the election.

2. With MMP, parties get the number of seats they deserve. Under MMP, if a party received 10% of the vote, they'll receive 10% of the seats (not 0) and if they receive 40% of the vote, they'll receive 40% of the seats (not 60%). This is accomplished through the allocation of the 29 extra seats to candidates from Party Lists.

Candidates on Party Lists stand for election just like other members - effectively, when voters cast their Party vote, they are endorsing that party's list. Another advantage of List Candidates is that when they're elected they can look out for the whole province, rather than just one local area. Most importantly - the List mechanism ensures that each party is represented proportionally.

3. With MMP, there will be no more false majorities. Because a Mixed Member Proportional electoral system will result in more accurate representation in the legislature, political parties will no longer be able to govern as though they have a majority unless they have actually earned one. This will effectively mean that in order to govern, parties will have to work together and find common ground.

Unlike the minority governments that we're used to, MMP minority governments are actually quite stable in most jurisdictions - fixed election dates are the rule because parties are not busy jockeying for a shot at a (false) majority government. It is worth noting that many of Canada's great reforms took place during minority governments.

Big Bad Wolf

2007-04-27T21:32:00.001-04:00

Blow down the Big Bad Wolf
he's a pushover
a shove lover
a rum runner
a truth loser
battle cruiser
Blow up the Big Bad Wolf

technorati tags:poetry

Two-socks

2007-04-11T21:34:00.001-04:00

Wearing different coloured socks today. It's a laundry thing.

It's like each step I'm a different person. Black sock dave is walks to the fridge and thinks about what would be a really good name for a band. White sock dave walks back and decides it's time to hang up the shirts that he brought back from the laundromat. Black sock dave strives confidently back to the fridge for a beer. White sock dave thinks isn't it about time we called the landlord about the fact that our heat stopped working last night. Of course this happens more rapidly than this. Each step is a change in perspective. Each stride the sound of pants brushing against themselves. A pendulum swings with my hips.

This is probably the kind of thing that drove Harvey Dent insane. I mean, it would be if he were a real person.

Ba-da-bing Ba-da-boom, Mario's jump to power

2007-03-28T14:36:00.000-04:00

What's surprising about the rise of ADQ leader Mario Dumont as a major force in Quebec politics is how few Mario brothers allusions are appearing in the headlines... in ten years, when eighties kids start getting into editorial positions, then you'll see our true wit. Until then, I offer these titles:

"Flower power: How Mario torched the competition"
"Mario's magic mushroom: ADQ growth continues"
"Mario starts work on new level"
"Cimbing the beanstock"
"Mario's star power"
"Shell Game: Mario's jump to prominence"
"Mario's New Hat"

And my personal favourite, "Charest wins a Luigi government"

Come on newspapers, it's called the lowest common denominator for a reason!

Maybe the headlines are better in French...

Viral Marketing Ploy for tofuhaiku.com

2007-03-12T23:25:00.001-04:00

Have you heard about the Tofu Haiku poetry contest?

Check out our panel of superstar judges. Those who know me will know how excited I am that John K. Samson of The Weakerthans is part of our panel. Those who know vegetarian cooking will be excited that Sarah Kramer is also a judge. (She has a cool blog here).

I swear the contest is really cool. It's a project of the Toronto Vegetarian Association, my place of employment.

Anyhow, if you think this is cool, please help us spread the word.

read more | digg story

Tories to steal Liberal green plan

2007-01-17T12:55:00.000-05:00

TheStar.com is reporting that the Conservative Party of Canada may announce they've stolen the Liberal Party environment strategy this Friday.

On Friday in Victoria, the Tories are expected to set out a plan similar to one introduced by the Liberals in 2004 that seeks to produce 4,000 megawatts of energy from wind power over four years, according to observers. The Climate Action Network said the government must increase its use of green power to 12,000 megawatts by 2013 if the country is to provide a credible response to climate change.
The new Tory EnerGuide program is expected to include a tax-credit incentive for homeowners, but no cash to fund qualified efficiency inspectors, said John Bennett, a spokesperson for the environmental coalition.
He and other environmentalists said they were concerned the Tories were simply repackaging old Liberal announcements, meaning that progress on the environment file will have been delayed by about one year.

If Stephane Dion wrote for my blog he might complain that he was planning to repackage those old Liberal announcements. Despite the one year delay on environmental progress noted in the article, there is still hope in Liberal circles that the delay will be prolongued for a few more years so they can make those announcements again to remind Canadians of the difference between the Liberal vision for innovating the environment and the... oh, shiny, what do you guys think about cutting transfers to the provinces?

American Keynote

2006-11-30T17:00:00.000-05:00

So, it's been reported with some frequency that some Liberals are upset that Howard Dean, an American, was invited to give the keynote address at the Liberal leadership convention. But wait, this sounds familiar. Who was the keynote in 2005? Wasn't it some fancy professor from Harvard that people kept comparing to Pierre Trudeau?

Prediction: Howard Dean will run for the Liberal Party of Canada leadership in 2007.

Don't worry, he'll do fine... there's only so much steam you can work up going from Ontario to Quebec to British Columbia then back to Ontario and then maybe to Nova Scotia stopping in PEI, Newfoundland and New Brunswick and then to Quebec and Ontario again and the praries. Vermont is practically the eleventh province anyhow, and, unlike his predecessor, it's not like Dean was on the wrong side of an issue as important to Canadians as the US-led invasion of Iraq.

Not your cousin from Vermont's Democrats

2006-11-09T16:48:00.000-05:00

Interesting that the story of the election is Democrats retaking the House and the Senate and how this signals a rejection of GWB's Iraq plan. Also interesting that Democratic Senate (Majority) Leader Harry Reid would say that American voters "have come to the conclusion, as we did some time ago, that a one-party town simply doesn't work." So Harry Reid apparently wants either a) another Republican President in 2008 or b) to lose control of the House, Senate or both.

Another under-reported element of interest in this election concerns the Democrats strategy in nominating candidates for many of the seats they won in both houses. According to CBS News chief Washington correspondent Bob Schieffer, "these Democrats that were elected last night are conservative Democrats. They are not like some of the liberal firebrands in the House right now."

Also interesting is the irony that the "internet bloggers" who supported Ned Lamont's candidacy have helped to create a political situation which gives their adversary Joe Lieberman a great deal more power than he had going into this election.

The US electoral system is funny; while this is inevitably a good turn of events, it will be interesting to see just how good. It will be interesting to see whether the Dems use their political capitol to persue impeachment hearings for an already unpopular President rather than, let's say, passing laws and governing the country.

Final thought: Does anyone else suspect that Donald Rumsfeld stepped down as Secretary of Defence to take a run for the Presidency?

A pessimistic Kyoto prediction

2006-10-19T17:59:00.000-04:00

...sometime in 2011

Prime Minister Michael Ignatieff announced his environment plan today, setting targets to meet Canada's Kyoto requirements. Citing the Conservatives inaction on the environment during their five years in power, Ignatieff said that his plan "sets out clear goals to meet Canada's international commitments." The targets would be met by 2111 - 99 years after the deadline set out in the protocol.

"Obviously Canada can't meet these targets now," Ignatieff declared. "It would be nice of course, but it just isn't possible given the current reality in Canada. If I could go back in time and come to Canada and become Prime Minister earlier, then maybe that reality could be altered. Unfortunately, that's not possible in this reality," he explained. "But then, what is reality," he added inquisitively.

Ignatieff was characterized as an "out-of-touch, Liberal hypocrite" by interim Conservative leader Monte Solberg who said the Liberal plan contradicted Ignatieff's earlier statement that he would meet the targets set out in the Kyoto Protocol by 2012 - within one year of taking office.

Just two weeks ago, the Prime Minister said the goals were within reach. "When I said that Canada couldn't meet the [Kyoto] targets, it was because I may have misjudged some of the intelligence on this matter," Ignatieff said. "But I, Michael Ignatieff, former Harvard Professor and leader of the Liberal Government of Canada, will meet Canada's Kyoto targets."

"The environment is," Ignatieff continued, "something that we can't live without. It sustains us. It is... something that we can either destroy or protect. Sometimes it may be necessary for us to destroy the planet in order to protect it."

Today's plan takes effect in 2045.

...

12 WAYS OF STOPPING THE RADIO OUTSIDE THE MUCHMUSIC STORE

2006-10-12T23:03:00.000-04:00

1. Cut the wires.

2. Go in and ask politely. "Please. Can you stop? Just stop."

3. Shout the radio out.

4. Smash windows until alarm goes.

5. Run for City Council. Defeat popular incumbent with whom you agree on pretty much anything. Build a consensus that listening to this radio outside the MuchMusic Store is fucking painful and that it be prohibited.

6. Blow own eardrums.

7. Buy MuchMusic. Shut down the store. Open a museum devoted to the old store.

8. Stay here till the store closes. If the radio doesn't turn off it won't matter cause you can't hear it anymore.

9. Arrange a white noise attack featuring a local drumming group.

10. Tap into the satellite feed (or the cable running from the ChumCity Building). Replace music and ads with sound poetry. Crack. Pop. Sssss. Splice in old radio addresses by Tommy Douglass from when he was premier of Saskatchewan.

11. Use your charming wit and good looks to convince staff that instead of playing their crap outside, they should let you play your crap inside. Put on Allan Ginsberg singing about mansex. It will be so good that they staff will sabotage their own radio system permanently and run away with you to Montreal. You will raise three kids together, two girls and a boy, all hippies.

12. The streetcar comes.

What's in a blog? What's in a roti?

2006-08-18T00:00:00.000-04:00

In a blog you will find potatoes and other vegetables. Sometimes you will find eggpant or channa or spinach and hopefully butternut squash.

In a roti you will talk about how much you love your job and how every good roti is wrapped in your parents house... that's why it's so cheap.

In this roti, you will find an old poem about the suburbs and you will try to sing it to your new iMac...

You will pretend that you have a band called something about Racoons and that you write songs about the suburbs involving pirates, veterans and how you left that binder at work.

You will stop having those recurring dreams about accidentally eating meat only to wake up one day with the uncomfortable feeling in your stomach like the veggie dog you had at the Sonic Youth concert may not have been a veggie dog after all and now you feel quite ill because of it.

You will blog about roti and you will talk about yourself in the second person.

The Kyoto Irony

2006-05-15T17:42:00.000-04:00

I only skimmed this article about the Conservative plan for Climate Change, but I found the conclusion quite wonderful:

"The irony is, had the Alliance-Conservatives not strongly opposed controls on greenhouse gas emissions over the past decade, the current Conservative government may not be in what they term an impossible position."

~ Simon Donner, in The Toronto Star

Corwin is a jerk

2006-05-14T21:46:00.000-04:00

... um, that's about it.

Resist the temptation

2006-04-25T11:00:00.000-04:00

So upon completing my five year Honours Arts Degree in Psychology & English, I've skipped town. I've moved to Toronto and next Monday I start work at the Toronto Vegetarian Association. I'm pretty excited about this.

In case you are tempted to ask me why I'm a vegetarian OR to tell me why you are not one (which is frequently the reaction I get when I mention it), please go to www.veg.ca - this is the TVA's website. It has all sorts of wonderful information about the social and personal benefits of vegetarianism and relevant resources, links and info for Toronto vegetarians.

Also, for those wondering, I would be supporting Carolyn Bennett for the leadership of the Liberal Party of Canada, were I not already in the New Democratic Party of Canada. Remember us? We're the reason Liberals campaign from the left.

Ten years is the usual amount of time it takes Liberals to adopt / implement NDP policies / soundbites, so it is fitting that Liberals recently adopted Bob Rae, who was, admittedly, one of our most successful sounbites. Speaking of the former Premier, this article about Mr Rae is good and could be useful to inocculate those Social Democrats tempted to support Rae.

How you feel.

2006-03-08T02:00:00.000-05:00

  Pull tomatoes from
    the air    juggle   toss in bed
      squeeze seeds   juice and skin.

You really want to know?

2006-03-03T18:30:00.000-05:00

Busy week, this one

2006-03-01T01:52:00.000-05:00

Wednesday March oneth
   - some Haitian dude is speaking at Laurier (1PM-N1042)
   - LSPIRG Fundraising meeting (7PM-BA209)
   - I'm applying for some job in journalism/calgary
   - Apparently, something called rent is due

Thursday March twoth
   - A great play I wrote with Jeff about Chad Kroeger is performed at FR!NGE (7-MaureenForresterRecitalHall.$6)

Friday March thirst
   - Economic Aid Team Coordinator applications close
   - Poet Laureate applications close

Saturday March fourd
   - My play again! (7PM-Mofo)
   - A party, maybe go out for dinner with parents

Sunday March fiver
   - A day of rest?
   - Not quite, I'm applying for a job in socialjustice/thegeeteeyay

Monday March sixm
   - The Yes Men are at Laurier (2:30-Recital Hall)
   - Senate Meeting (4-6-SenateChambers) where we find out if Dr. Rosehart is going to tell us how much tuition will go up at Laurier next year (it's kind of a big deal)

Tuesday March sevend
   - Lucky number, seven

Wednesday March eightest
   - Economic Aid Team Executive applications are due (www.wlusuhr.com)
   - FR!NGE Festival of Laurels, award show, poetry gala, good time; naming of Laurier's new Laureate
   - Keren's twentieth birthday

Thursday March nineth
   - my sister's fifteenth birthday
   - Sonal's twenty-first birthday

Friday March tend
   - Laurier Activist New Democrats election (2:30-Wilf'sDen)

Are you writing this down?

Go for it, be Laureate

2006-02-26T23:30:00.000-05:00

Wanted:
   - One Poet Laureate

Job Description

You will be expected to do some of the following things:
   - Poeticize for/to your peers
   - Organize Poetry Readings at and around Laurier
   - Take charge of Poetry WLU, the Laurier poetry anthology
   - Revive the English Club
   - Get some funding from Campus Clubs and/or the English Department
   - Send lots of emails about all those things
   - Write poems commemorating significant Laurier people and events
   - Maybe start a Laurier poet blog
   - Defend title from challengers as demanded

The successful applicant should have the following characteristics:
   - Poetics
   - Friends who'll write poems and read them at poetry readings
   - Optimal cliche-detection skills
   - Spelling & grammar naggery
   - Ability to email a million people and make risky posters
   - Some kind of motivation to spread truth and beauty through the galaxy OR a motivation to expose the crap of human existence

If you think you've got the stuff of poets, send me:
   - Your resume
   - Two to three pages of your work
   - A cover letter outlining what would make you a good Laureate

Please submit* your** application by Friday March 3rd.
* Send your stuff to me at david dot r dot alexander at gmail dot com
** No ex-patriates! Ex-pats get to be Poet Hermits, not Laureates...

To Poet Hermits and other non-Laureates:
- If you submit poetry, you may be invited to read as well

The new Laureate will be Laureanated next Wednesday night (March 8th) at the Fr!nge Festival of Laurels drama-poetry celebration/awardshow. Applicants may be contacted to read at this epic event.

That is all.

Go to sleep my dear Maslow

2006-02-21T05:30:00.000-05:00

My dear Maslow,

You worry about me too much.

In response to your inquiry:

1, Do you hate sports because of what they mean or because you're a prick?

I am uneasy about sports because I feel they foster a competitive spirit in some that could be manipulated by fascists. In addition, I feel that professional sporting constitutes a great waste of human and material resources that would be better spent making the world suck less. But perhaps I dislike sports just to be difficult.

2, Are you too hungry to sleep?

Asking this question usually proves the affirmative. I wonder whether you are simply projecting your own hunger onto me. I have prepared a bagel with peanut butter to amend this issue. I would have gone with pizza Pockets, but I already had two of those today and know that they are filled with fatty gooodness, and must be consumed sparingly.

3, Who will run your clubs when you're gone?

I'm working on it.

4, Do you want to stay in Waterloo, or do you just not want to leave?

We were just talking about this tonight actually. Greg said something fishy about living in some kind of oversized pond. It should have been a frog metaphor. I've heard that Toronto lilypads are more expensive than those Waterloo lilypads. Then there's the matter of making the jump... now all I can think of is Magnolia... I hate that movie.

5, Should you do more school or get a job? Where?

I definitely should get a job so I can pay off some debts and start sufficing, um, self-like... as for school, I'm not sure... seems I could move to Toronto for Journalism or attempt the Laurier Community Psychology program. Or look for some social justice work. But this question takes me too close "what do you want to be when you grow up" territory. I think I wanted to be an astronaut (it was the eighties!), a fireman or a police officer. Kids seem to pick jobs that have really clear responsibilities... I need that. let's move on.

6, When are you going to do your thesis?

I'm working on it.

7, The girl question...

You really not call this the "girl" question. Some people consider girl to be a term of disempowerment. But I know you were probably just being emo, and so I'm willing to forgive you.

8, What are you forgetting?

Recently, I have dreamt of eating meat. While I would welcome some psychoanalysis on this matter, please do not take this as an opportunity to lecture me about being hungry because I'm vegetarian.

Do try to get some rest.

Yours,
David Alexander

Rever - Revel - Reveal - Revert

2006-02-16T19:55:00.000-05:00

I don't really know what to say write now. They say to right what you know so here we go.

The future, a vacuous marshmallow of human indignity walking through a campfire like a boyscout, they're smashing his guitar in the fire because it looks really cool. We walk into the salloon through the vampire fires, steak is the least of your problems; the batteries in your pocket haven't been recharged for days because you never check to see what you're carrying around in there; keys and cards - pin numbers that come from your cold hands.

I will remember this snow day as the time I walked to school singing with Broken Social Scene. I will remember this day as the day I went to school early then played some board games at the cafe then went home to get something to eat. I will remember this day as the day I remembered that I still have to read the Wasteland and probably a million other things that stick out in my mind like real debts that are mine. I am A minor!

You should take more time feeling the cold in your basement she thinks to herself or to me or whatever. You should learn to play country songs on your guitar, even though you have no idea where to start and your fingers really are quite cold because basement apartments suck like your bad guitarist self. You really should spend more time working and less time lying around on other people's couches, and in bedrooms.

When will we see that hour eyes only work for sixty minutes before they become possessions. Give me your eyes! I need sunshine! Hour hearts beat time out very slowly. You know our art eats timeouts. Timeouts vary. Slowly, check with a retailer for more detail.

We will need better strings if we want to sound like a country music group. Ye ha!

NDP Victory Imminent!

2006-01-21T15:39:00.000-05:00

If the polling trends of this graph hold true, the NDP is set to take over the Liberal party by a week Monday and surpass the Conservites to win the election two weeks after it is held!

For any undecideds wondering why I think the impending NDP victory would be a fantastic thing for Canada, you can read an article I wrote here (halfway down the page).

Also, if you want to know why childcare is such an important part of mediating child poverty, read this.

And the winner of the federal debate is...

2006-01-10T01:40:00.000-05:00

Steve Paikin. CTV News did a segment from Laurier where they interviewed those Laurier students who watched the televised debates in the 24 Hour Lounge (mainly partisans). Paikin wins because he scored multiple knockout punches, though I'm not certain how many since CTV News kept getting in our collective faces. As far as I know, my partisan rant was not aired.

"He's my brother from another mother."

2005-12-19T01:00:00.000-05:00

So I'm home in Toronto now, though I spent most of today driving around with my dad, his wife Susan and my sisters Tessa and Jessica.

In the car, Tessa, my older sister, kept talking about her gangster friends. I had to explain to her that the word gangster actually refers to delinquent behaviour... not clothing and a taste for rap. Anyhow, this all came up because she kept saying gangster phrases.

"Oh no you didn't," she said as she snapped her fingers. "Word to your mother." The only reason I know that phrase is because an old friend of mine used it sarcastically as a warm goodbye. She insisted that this was code. I've always thought it was a nice thing to say to someone. Like "say hi to your lovely mom." But Tessa informs me that it is, instead, a term of disrespect. Of course, she explains it not as a user of gansta language, but more like me. She pronounces the 'er' in gangster and the second 'd' in didn't. I'm pretty sure she'll end up teaching a pop culture course in university.

One constant of driving in the SmallerUtilityVehicle with the family is that my dad makes silly jokes: "How is it," he asks my sister Jessica, who is eleven years old, and now strong enough to beat me in a thumb war "that you and your brother have different mothers," he pauses for effect... the effect is usually one or more of us rolling our eyes, "but the same step-mother?"

Tessa explains that it's because we have the same father and Jessica clarifies further: "he's my brother from another mother."

So anyhow, they wrote a Christmas song with Susan. As soon as I get the rights to it from Jessica, I'll post it on these pages.

Canada's net worth grows 0.7%

2005-12-17T19:15:00.000-05:00

The Gazette reports that

"The country's net worth reached $4.4 trillion at the end of the third quarter, valuing Canadians' net worth at $135,500 per capita, Statistics Canada reported Friday.

"The figure measuring the net non-financial assets held by Canadians was up 0.7 per cent for the period, but was less than half the pace set in the second quarter and down from its average of 1.5 per cent growth over the past 10 quarters.

"The gain resulted from an increase in national wealth, offset by an increase in net foreign debt."

Now, I'm no economist, but isn't 0.7% the proportion of Canada's GDP that a certain advocacy group would like for Canada to invest in foreign aid to developing countries? Isn't a certain Liberal prime minister to blame for that not happeneing? I know that GDP and Net Worth must be different things, but this is quite a coincidence!

Let's get more women on Board

2005-12-15T05:25:00.000-05:00

"A brief look at the past three years reveals a worrisome pattern: out of seventeen elected Directors (including the President and Vice President: University Affairs) five women were elected to the Board this year, there were six last year and only four the year before that. For those who aren't capable of dividing by seventeen in your heads, that averages out to 29.4%. The notable factor is not that women don't get elected as much as men; women are actually more likely than men to be voted into offive by Laurier students. The reason for this discrpency is that fewer women run in the WLUSU elections."

Discuss.

It's times like these (and the election debates) that I wish clublaurier still ran feature articles. And that our students were interested enough to write such things.

New Democratic Parties

2005-12-14T11:59:00.000-05:00

So tonight is the official NDP office opening. And tomorrow night the NDP presents a film called WAL-MART: The High Cost of Low Price.

Official NDP Office Opening
5:30, Wednesday December 14th
162 Victoria Street (at Park)

If you're interested in getting involved in any of the local campaigns come out to the opening. To get there from Waterloo, take the bus to King & Victoria, get off the bus, make a right on Victoria and walk a couple streets to where Park Street is. That's where you'll find the office.

WAL-MART: The High Cost of Low Price
7:00, Thursday December 15th
Princess Twin on King Street

If you want to see a neat movie, tickfive bucks aets for the WAL-MART flick are t the door.

Boring post, I know. Sorry. No thug talk either... I've got to be the illest emcee that people know of.

Ta(c)o and the art of weblog maintenance

2005-12-12T18:41:00.000-05:00

Read Everything has been abbreviated to Rever.

Tacos will be held at seven o'clock at Ethels.

I no longer eat the meat ones because I'm a vegetarian.

Also, it was my blog's first birthday last week and my visit total passed ten thousand unique visitors.

Things are looking up in the world of Dave.

Childcare: Big brothers are good or bad?

2005-12-12T04:32:00.000-05:00

The Toronto Star talks about child care today...

First up, conservative/libertarian alarmist Rondi Adamson

"A national daycare program is wrong on two levels.

"First, it represents more big government, something Canadians don't need. Do we want the government running a child-care program, when they have bungled health care?

"Do we want Ottawa, or our provincial capitals, deciding what games children play? Or what snacks they eat? Or when they nap? What parent would want this? Does this not smack, creepily, of the Stalinization of child-rearing?"

Is Adamson implying that government-delivered childcare was the first step towards the brutal political, economic and physical repression and persecution that killed millions of Russians during Stalin's rein? Can we please have an intelligent conversation about policy without someone being compared to a Dictator or a Nazi? I'm appalled that The Star prints this filth!

But wait, what would be a better solution for Canadian children?

"Ideally, Canadians would pay lower taxes, allowing more women to stay home with their children."

Oh Rondi Adamson, that's your answer for everything... Economic prosperity? Tax cuts for corporations. Sponsorship scandal? Tax cuts for smaller government. Same-sex marriage? Tax cuts for straight people. Poverty? Tax cuts for everyone!

Luckily, Thomas Axworthy was in the paper to offer some clarity on the benefits of childcare.

"Giving money directly to parents is like giving tax cuts to companies and individuals in the hope that their individual choices will make the economy more productive.

"This is the constant refrain for most economists.

"But, there is an alternative productivity strategy of investing in people — early child care, training, aboriginal peoples, the disabled, immigrants, lifelong learning — so that Canada will have the best quality workforce in the world. This is directed investment.

"Along with investing in people, we need investment in infrastructure, especially in our cities. Public transit, shelter for the homeless, Internet connectivity for rural areas, will not come about through individuals having more tax cuts.

"Directed investments in infrastructure and human resources or direct payments to individuals.

"That is the fundamental choice before us."

Oh I see, the fundamental choice is about how we can better stimulate the economy. As a social science student, I can certainly sympathize with the need for social services to constantly justify their existence in terms of long-term financial savings. But when we talk about social services in such stark economic terms, we lose sight of how childcare affects the human experience of those in need.

Thankfully, The Star's Linda McQuaig was able to summarize the benefits of chilcare in one sentance!

"Childhood development has been exhaustively studied and the overwhelming consensus in the field is that children reap enormous intellectual, social, health and behavioural benefits from early childhood education programs."

Now I happen to know because of extensive research on my part what might seem obvious to many others. That is, the quality of childcare can actually have an effect on children. Factors like space, age-appropriate materials and spending time developing relationships with children can have a significant effect on kids' cognitive and socioemotional development.

I wonder, if we consider these factors, which party has the best policies for childcare... Linda McQuaig?

"The Conservatives are downright hostile to the notion of a national child-care program. But recognizing its popularity in vote-rich urban Canada, they tried to defuse the issue last week by instead offering parents direct annual payments of $1,200 per child.

"This would simply perpetuate our existing inadequate child-care system — much of it unregulated babysitting arrangements — while giving parents only enough to cover about two months of care.

"The Liberal plan is only marginally better, providing about $1 billion each year over a 10-year period — not enough for a good, comprehensive program. It also offers no reliable funding for new buildings.

"This is like trying to create a public school system from scratch, without providing money to build any actual schools. Why bother when there are so many unused basements?

"Worse still, the Liberal plan fails to restrict the public money to non-profit care. This leaves the door enticingly open to corporate daycare chains, for which profits are the top priority.

You forgot the NDP!!!

"(The NDP, traditionally the strongest advocate for national child care, is expected to announce its plan soon.)"

Oh.

Because kids under six are most vulnerable to the effects of poverty, childcare and other early childhood interventions can be hugely important mediating factors for low-income children. Let's hope the NDP has something better for our kids.

Also, let's hope the article I wrote about child poverty gets picked up by The Record.

Either you's wit us or you's wit da seperatists

2005-12-06T03:54:00.000-05:00

So I gizoogled cbc.ca and this was the top story. I thought of Greg...

"Canadian Jewish groups said Monday it was 'inapproprizzles' n 'incomprehensizzle' fo' Liberal MP Jean Lapierre ta use a Nazi analogy ta criticize comments made by tha brotha of tha Bliznoc Quebecois."

Further evidence that Duceppe has da mad skillz!
(He apologized for being overzealous right after Lapierre made the offending comments.)

-----

In other news, Ujjal Dosanjh should talking about Tommy Douglas... [I added some commentary...]

"My question simply is: Is Mr. Tommy Douglas spinning in his grave thinking about the kind of tactics Mr. Layton has been using to engineer this unholy alliance of the separatists [like Jean LaPierre?] and the Cons (Conservatives) [Belinda Stronach?] and the NDP to bring us into a winter election?"

My question is this: How is anyone supposed to answer that question?

Also worth noting, it seems that Dosanjh is implying that Douglas is would be mad about the winter election. But I'm pretty sure Douglas participated in the last winter election. Ah well...

A tale of two cities

2005-12-04T01:22:00.000-05:00

Thousands of people braved the cold whether and put a lot of personal resources into getting to two Canadian cities yesterday... for somewhat different reasons.

In Hamilton

The contest marked just the third time two unbeaten teams met in the Vanier Cup and they put on a fitting show before 16,827 predominantly Laurier fans on a cool and cloudy day at Ivor Wynne Stadium. The temperature was minus-3 but a 20 km/h wind made it feel more like minus-9, which left the ball hard and slippery and contributed to several dropped passes.

In Montreal

Tens of thousands of people ignored frigid temperatures Saturday to lead a worldwide day of protest against global warming.

...

The demonstration coincided with the 10-day UN Climate Change Conference underway in Montreal, where officials are reviewing and updating the Kyoto protocol on lowering greenhouse gas emissions.

Go (Eco)Hawks!

Bored of Directors?

2005-12-01T18:14:00.000-05:00

In the great tradition I started last year by posting my Midterm Report online, I invite you gentle reader, to peruse this great document and let me know what you think.

Review

Somebody, somewhere, once said that change is slow. In fact, I think maybe a lot of people said it a lot of times in a lot of places. Nevertheless, this is one cliché that you can depend upon.

Over my twenty-two months on its Board of Directors, the Wilfrid Laurier University Students’ Union has made slow progress towards better provision for the needs of students and better provision of opportunities for students to become involved with their students’ union. It has made no progress on better representation and engagement of students on pertinent issues, though that may change when this year’s representational reviews are completed.

Providing for the needs of students

I have worked this year to ensure that our business services offer affordable, healthy, vegetarian meals for students. I’ve done this through motions, through meetings with the Vice President: Marketing and through general comments at Board meetings.

Over the first six months of my term, I developed and proposed the creation of a new committee devoted to working with students to reduce financial stress. The Economic Aid Team would have provided, information, opportunities and meals so that students could save money. In the worst decision made during my time on the Board, my colleagues voted against its creation.

Later this term, I proposed that the Board pass a motion in favour of a tuition reduction, which was defeated. Nevertheless, I feel the debate helped raise people’s awareness about the issue.

At the Board’s budget meeting this summer, I supported Anthony Piscitelli’s attempted to donate an additional $50, 000 to the bursary fund, because, as I predicted in July, we underestimated our budget surplus. One of the things that's frustrating about the budgeting process is the fact that the Budget is brought to the Board without much chance for us to influence it ahead of time. Then when disagreements occur, it seems like we're overstepping our role, when we weren't really given much opportunity to talk about our strategic vision for WLUSU ahead of time. I’d like to see this changed.

Another area where WLUSU could help students is in the provision of affordable housing. In Waterloo right now, rent is high and there are opportunities to apply for funding to build affordable housing.

Providing more opportunities for students

Providing opportunities for students at Laurier is something WLUSU does very well. Last year as a Director, I called for a formal review of the union’s hiring practices. While work was done on this project last year, I’m happy to report that Lyndsey Jones, this year’s Vice President: Human Resources and Development, has continued this review and is in the process of improving the hiring process.

Another area the Board has been responsible for improving the nature of opportunities to students is in its decision to eliminate Orientation Week Volunteer fees and to award tuition credits to the Chair and Vice Chair of the Board. Although the Board at first rejected the latter proposal, upon further consideration we agreed that tuition credits were an appropriate reward for the essential work done by the holders of these two positions. In addition to rewarding these two devoted individuals, this decision opened up discussions about the accessibility of volunteer positions to students in financial need.

One area I’d like to address in my remaining term on Board is the campus clubs structure. Campus clubs provide great opportunities for students, but the current clubs structure is far from perfect. I’d like the board to consider the creation of a campus clubs advisory council. This body of representatives from various clubs would advise and make formal recommendations to the campus clubs executive on issues of club governance.

In addition, I am currently working with my constituents to create a public interest research group at Laurier. This organization would be devoted to environmental, social justice and academic issues at Laurier. It is my hope that a public interest research group could partner with WLUSU on important projects and provide valuable research on issues such as financial need and sustainability. This organization has great potential to provide unique opportunities for students interested in these issues.

Engaging students in the decision making process

Engaging students in WLUSU’s decision-making process is something that has been done very poorly this year. While there seem to be lots of ideas about how to do this, I heard all of these same ideas during the election in February 2004, at summer planning in 2004, again in the fall of 2004, in the February election of 2005, at summer planning 2005 and again at our most recent democratic forum. Despite all this, students still don’t know what we do, never mind how they can influence our decisions. I pointed out this lack of engagement in a speech I gave after the board defeated my Economic Aid Team proposal, a project that was developed in cooperation with a number of concerned constituents.

Another example of the Board’s disconnection from students was the Board’s lack of action on the potential faculty strike. Though the negotiations concluded in a good way, many students were worried and confused about the possibility of a strike. The Board could have offered clarity and a place for students to discuss these issues. Unfortunately, we chose to sit on the sidelines rather than engage students.

Goals for the remainder of my term

-Push for the implementation of affordable food menus at Wilf’s and the Terrace
-Encourage the Board to hold more events to get feedback from students on different issues
-Encourage the development of a volunteer bursary program
-Call for the creation of the Economic Aid Team in time for next year’s hiring process
-Call for changes to the budgeting process so that Directors have opportunity to give input ahead of time
-Propose a Campus Clubs Advisory Council
-Propose the initiation of an affordable housing project
-Support another donation to student bursaries
-Support the creation of a public interest research group

tomato sauce

2005-11-21T00:30:00.000-05:00

The problem with living alone is that while the large tomato sauce jars are still a great deal, one person cannot eat that much sauce before it starts to go moldy.

Did I just eat a bunch of mold? I'm pretty sure I did.

How to be a writer (3)

2005-11-17T03:00:00.000-05:00

(1) (2)

I get to school and I'm late for a meeting. Walking into the boardroom I'm relieved that this is my last meeting of the day. There is no need to check the clock and wonder where to go next.
         At Ethel's tonight I yelled at my friends for spending too much time on their school work. What we need is more readings and lectures about art and politics. Display boards and letter-writing campaigns. Actually what we need is love. Or maybe more self-discipline and a good job and a cheap apartment.

I get home and Anthony wants to know if I've read some email he's sent me.
         This is like the suburbs again. I'm commuting from my basement bedroom. I'm in meetings all day and answering emails at night from home. I'm waiting for when we leave Waterloo, preparing to move to my next house once I've paid all my debts.
         I microwave the rice and beans I made last night. Maybe my heart is broken enough. Maybe I could write about rice and beans for the rest of my life.
         I sit down to read Anthony's email and I have four new messages. I read them, then edit an old love poem and go to bed. The poem is about ghosts. I think about maybe adding a coyote, but decide not to in case it's cultural appropriation.
         In bed I wonder about the things I will do tomorrow. Senate meeting. Soup kitchen. Yearbook. Concert. This is not spontaneous. This is community activism and informal social networks. I'm putting up posters in my head: Pacifist. Feminist. Vegetarian. New Democrat...
         I fall asleep alone with lots of covers. In my dream I invent a new person to love me, but I can never remember what she looks like (naked). All I remember is that she's so much stronger than I am.
         When I wake up in the morning it's cold. This is why I stay in bed for as long as I can. This is why I rush to school each day. I am trying to stay out of the cold. I am trying to forget that dream.

How to be a writer (2)

2005-11-16T11:00:00.000-05:00

--- from (1) ---

"That dude was righteous!"
         I'm walking back to school with Heather. We're both happy with the reading.
         "I didn't know he did Dead Dog Cafe. My parents love that show," she half shouts.
         I tell Heather the question the other lady asked about Coyote and we laugh. We learned that in school. She thinks it's stupid to ask an author what something represents in their book.
         "I would have asked him if he listens to Prince and The Revolution."
         "Why didn't you ask him that?"
         "Because I found him too intellectually intimidating."
         I didn't find him to be that way. If anything he was too ordinary. I was expecting him to be more subtle. More like his stories.
         "What would you have asked him?"
         "Well, I asked him about writing, but I think I would have liked to ask him about Stephen Lewis." He mentioned that "A Short History of Indians in Canada" was written one day before a Stephen Lewis talk. "But his politics are pretty clear in his writing. I couldn't think of a good question about that."
         I'm always thinking about politics. All my poems are about politics or failed relationships. I tell Heather the advice from Thomas King.
         "You're gonna have a wife and kids, right?"
         "I guess."
         "I was talking the other day with Anne Marie about what a good soccer dad you'd be."
         "I wouldn't get married until I'm thirty though," I say, realizing that I'm twenty three years old.
         "Just wait till you're forty and knock up someone who's around thirty."
         "I'll do that."

--- to (3) ---

How to be a writer (1)

2005-11-16T03:00:00.000-05:00

So Thomas King is signing books. He's signing books and I'm there waiting, next in line. The woman ahead of me is asking about Coyote.
         "Coyote is there as a warning. He does things so that others don't have to."
         I knew that.
         He's just finished reading some new short stories. One is called "Bad Men Who Love Jesus." He said before reading it that he didn't know he'd be reading in a Church and that this story was maybe inappropriate. That's what he says, but I'm on to him. What a trickster!
         I hand him my book and ask him to sign it for me. He asks my name and I ask him if he has any advice for a young writer.
         "Don't try to make a living out of it. Find a job to pay the bills. Find a cheap place. Learn to live on rice and beans."
         "Well I've done that."
         "Good. And don't get a girlfriend or a pet or kids." I've done that too. I'm starting to think this isn't very good advice. "If you really want to write," he continues, "then you don't want to have anything around to distract you."
         I am expecting something less tangible, like what that Jack Nicholson says in As Good As It Gets. ("How do you write women so well?" a woman asks. "I think of a man," he replies, "then I take away all reason and accountability.")
         Thomas King's advice is decidedly less profound. At least he didn't just say write a lot.

--- (2) (3) ---

List of things that Dave finds very intimidating

2005-11-08T02:00:00.000-05:00

1. Applying for Grad School
2. Applying to go to Botswana
3. Finding a good job
4. Girls
5. LSPIRG plans
6. Speaking alone to the WLUSU Board of Directors
7. Making 16 pages of yearbook in 7 days
8. His thesis
9. Not having any money at all
10. His thesis
I've said that

Kunstler on the War to Save Suburbia

2005-11-04T13:00:00.000-05:00

I recently discovered that my favourite suburb-fighting author has a weekly blog.

This week, James Howard Kunstler explains the truth of the Iraq War...

You want truth, Progressive America? Here's the truth: the War to Save Suburbia entailed an unavoidable strategic military enterprise. Saving Suburbia required that the Middle East be pacified or at least stabilized, because two-thirds of the world's remaining oil is there (and in case you haven't figured this out by now, Suburbia runs on oil, and the oil has to be cheap or we couldn't afford to run it). The three main oil-producing countries in the Middle East, going from west-to-east are Saudi Arabia, Iraq, and Iran. We had serious relationship problems with all of them at various times, and they with each other, leading at frequent intervals to a lot of instability in that region, and consequently trouble for us trying to run Suburbia on cheap oil (which they sold us in large quantities).

poem

2005-11-03T00:30:00.000-05:00

I wait for a bus on the corner by your college
so I can get back to the other side of London.
A truck that is speeding along the wide street
honks and it's honking at me, telling me
that on Sundays the bus doesn't use this stop.

So I walk to the real bus stop and later
I tell you about almost missing the bus
and about the truck that saved me. There is a
language without words, I type. There is,
you reply, and its often more affective.

Nerdy English students celebrate Halloween

2005-10-31T15:30:00.000-05:00

For Halloween this weekend I was cliche. This meant that I had cliches taped all over my shirt and a hollow plastic club. Whenever anyone asked me what I was I said "I'm cliche... what do I have to do, hit you over the head with it?"

Jeff wore a t-shirt that said "I heart forgotten lore" and had a raven on his shoulder. The raven said "Nevermore."

People would come up to Jeff and ask him if he was Edgar Allen Poe...

People: Hey, are you supposed to be Edgar Allen Poe?

Jeff: Naw man.

People: Then who are you?

Jeff: I'm the protagonist from "The Raven"

At the Burlesque show last night Tudor and I theorized that Halloween is about performing gender. This struck me because we were at a Burlesque show and because Carly dressed up like a cheerleader (it's important to note that Carly was actually a cheerleader) Corwin was Free Anarchy, Lord of all humans (it's also important to note that Corwin is Free Anarchy. Actually, that led to more discussion. It was pretty meta.) Anyhow, it wasn't unlike that episode of Buffy where Xander became a soldier, except that I don't think anyone became a cheerleader. And Tudor and Sra didn't dress up either. So really, it wasn't a lot like Buffy... but I wish it was.

Tim Hortons starts recycling program... that's so nineties

2005-10-28T03:00:00.000-04:00

So, fifteen years after the rest of us started doing it, Tim Hortons has discovered the glory of recycling. I know I should be happy about this, but what the fuck? They start doing something they should have been doing a decade ago and now they think they're the shit?

Tim Hortons: So we just found out about this cool new environmental thing. We're so conscious.

Dave: What the fuck are you talking about?

Tim Hortons: Hey, we just discovered this cool new band called The Tragically Hip. Have you heard of them?

Dave: Well the Hip are very good to have around, but why the fuck weren't you listening to them ten years ago?

Despite the fact that Amy and I haven't started using TimBitter.com yet, I have been paying attention to the Tim Hortons world. For example, this Macleans story is worth a read:

Lack, 63, collects Tims cups on his walks with his dog, and estimates he now has as many as 500. It's a problem, he says, that goes far beyond his tiny community. "Everywhere I've been, I've seen Tim Hortons cups all over the place," says Lack. "You'll see them in Iqaluit, you'll see them on Pelee Island."
...
Greg Skinner, a Tim Hortons spokesman, says the chain already recycles cups in the Moncton area and is willing to talk to anyone about doing likewise elsewhere. But a deposit-return system isn't in the cards. "It's a tax, and we don't see a tax as a way of stopping litter," says Skinner. "The key is education, letting people know that it's unacceptable."

In other Tim's news, October is Fair Trade Month. In celebration, perhaps an examination of Tim's FAQ on Fair Trade.
In answer to the question of whether their coffee is Fair Trade Certified, Tim Hortons sounds very responsible:

It is very important to Tim Hortons that, in all of our dealings, we live up to being a good corporate citizen. We use only credible suppliers and work closely with these suppliers to ensure that coffee growers are treated fairly.
...
While we certainly agree in principle with the aims and goals of Fair Trade coffee, our dilemma is that the growers who belong to the Fair Trade "Certified Co-ops" cannot supply either the volume or the quality of beans that our chain requires for our special blend.

         Note that this answer implies that Fair Trade Certification rests on the suppier... the same suppliers that Tim Hortons claims they work closely with. If in fact Tim Hortons' suppliers were so benevolent as to deserve Fair Trade Certification, they would receive it. Given that they do not have this certification, one can only assume that Tim Hortons is complicit in this failure. Whether it's a failure to provide "decent working and living conditions for workers" or "sustainable agricultural practices" or "free association of workers and co-ops, with structures for democratic decision-making" we don't know. I assume that they don't really know either.
         While Tim Hortons is careful to say that they use "a premium blend of 100% Arabica beans from several of the world's renowned coffee-producing regions," they are careful never to give away from where specifically their coffee comes. A good trick they probably learned from Nike, who, like Tim's, really only design their product; they don't produce coffee, they produce markets for coffee.
         While they aren't telling us who grows their coffee, we can certainly make an educated guess, given that ninety percent of the coffee sold in this country is purchased from Kraft, Nestle and Proctor & Gampble, none of whom are known to have a particularly benevolent spirit.

Liki

2005-10-25T02:04:00.000-04:00

#REDIRECT [[Read Everything Movement]]

return of the emo/litical

2005-10-11T02:30:00.000-04:00

Dave: should I blog about ONDYCon, how high school is like university, how I don't have a girlfriend, how I'll be speeching it up tommorrow or none of those things?

Liam: Man, you clearly are not busy enough.

Dave: or how about how my house is lonely....

*****

or I'll just post something I found on ndp.ca...

Madame Johanne Gélinas, Canada’s Commissioner of the Environment and Sustainable Development, charged that the federal government is chronically unable to sustain initiatives once they are launched: "When it comes to protecting the environment, bold announcements are made and then often forgotten as soon as the confetti hits the ground." Gélinas cited empty promises, poor accountability, organizational silos and unsustained programs as root causes.

Not so bad...

2005-10-03T15:30:00.000-04:00

In response to this, a review of my Saturday October 1st:

Good day.

Started in a slight funk, but made slightly awesome by a trip to the Kitchener's farmers market with Sonal, Bronwen and Kate.

Made more awesome by driving to London with Amy.

Made increasingly awesome by gorging on bbq of the sausage variety, cake of the mandarin and cherry cheese variety and salads of the pasta and potato variety.

Made totally awesome by Greg Smith, Alysia, Sherry, Laura, Tudor, Jeff "no blog" Latosik, hugs from the above and meeting Meredith, one of the first people (with Greg) to be into this whole internet scene.

Further awesomed by the Hoedown cds I brought and discussion about hipsters, politics and Institutes of the Promotion of "Yeah!" and of the Prevention of Catastrophic Loss variety.

Made furtherly awesome by Scene It?

Awesomed to the max by our decision to sleepover in London and make breakfast for each other the next morning!

The Pizza Party continues

2005-09-28T23:45:00.000-04:00

The economic theory advanced by The Pizza Party involved delivering frozen pizzas that could be heated by citizens at their discretion. It was believed by their greatest economic philosopher that by delivering these pizzas the economy could be stimulated and people could bake a bigger (pizza) pie. Thus the a few eggs were cracked and the dough of McKeynsian Economics was kneaded and, eventually, topped with pineapples.

People face trade-offs. These usually involve pizza.

2005-09-25T18:00:00.000-04:00

From The Sunday Star (italics mine)

As part of its tax-cutting, Ottawa plans to raise the threshold at which income tax applies, from $8,000 to $10,000.

Most tax cuts benefit the well-to-do, but this measure was touted as benefiting the 5 million Canadians earning less than $10,000 a year.

Yet almost none of these people pay any income tax, so they will receive no benefit from the measure.

The measure will, however, cost the government about $7 billion, because it means all taxpayers will pay slightly less tax. Next year, for instance, each taxpayer will save $16 — enough for a large pizza, notes Yalnizyan.

There's nothing wrong with a large pizza. I'd like one myself. But I'd happily forgo it, if Ottawa would instead put some of that $7 billion into, say, a national housing program, so that the 250,000 Canadians currently homeless or almost homeless would have a secure place to raise their children.

That, in the long run, would make a bigger difference to all of our lives than even a large pizza.

I think Linda McQuaig underestimates our love of pizza... I'd happily trade in our investment in childcare for another pizza; this would make our children happier too, especially if it was a Chucky Cheese pizza.

Think how many more pizzas we could get if we scrapped health care! No more visits to the doctor; let doctor pizza deal with your broken leg. Forget about environmental spending, pizza is our most precious commodity!

It's time for the government to consider a single-payer pizza delivery system. We'll finally be able to enjoy the cost savings that social democracies in Europe have long enjoyed. Together we can order a really big party pizza, a pizza with enough slices for all Canadians.

The Liberals will run a campaign as The Liberal Pizza Party of Canada. Their campaign will be "The Pizza You Want" and it will feature flexible topping and distribution methods for Canadians in rural and urban communities alike.

The Conservapizza Party will "Demand Better... Pizza." This campaign will be oriented around more efficient pizza, in contrast to LPP mismanagement, though Canadians will worry whether the Conservatives will attempt to limit our choice of toppings and that they might reintroduce private-delivery of pizza.

The New Democratic Pizza Party will offer "Green and Prosperous Pizzas that Leave No Canadians Hungry" (it will be very difficult to explain that a Green Pizza is not actually green; this will cost the NDPP the election). But the NDPP will force the LPP to pass a "Better Pizza Budget" containing measures to make pizza more environmentally sustainable, and to offer pizza subsidies for to low-income Canadians.

At any rate, once we perfect this system of pizza delivery at home, we can start to focus on feeding the international community. If we donated just zero point seven percent of our pizza to the poorest countries in Sub-Saharan Africa, they would have enough pizza for a whole year.

But our work doesn't end there, as a leader in pizza-care, our system will act as a model for the developing world and our experts will ensure that a strong pizza-baking infrastructure is developed so that all can share in the joy of more pizza.

Liberal hegemony

2005-09-25T04:30:00.000-04:00

A letter to The Cord this week called my article from last week's paper slanderous and unfit for publication. No, it wasn't that article.

The article I wrote was about peace, and it was used as evidence of the "liberal hegemony" that marks the halls, er, hall of The Cord Weekly. Well you are wrong letter writer. I mean, the paper fosters an attitude of liberalism, but it's not because I publish articles that criticize GWBush's handling of national security.

It's liberal because it's a newspaper.

I'm sick of hearing people talk about politics as though conservative and liberal are opposing viewpoints. The opposite of conservative is progressive. These terms refer to whether a society maintains older institutions or changes them. The opposite of liberal is repressive. These terms refer to a society's level of tolerance/freedom.

My article was not really liberal in this sense... in fact, what I was doing was simply a critical analysis of the US response to 9-11; evidence of an anti-American bias, perhaps (though I did mention my envy for what is ocurring in the US, so the case is not strong). A left-wing bias is evident, although The Cord has frequently published political articles by Brendan Jones, who writes from a right-wing viewpoint.

If you want evidence of liberal hegemony, read this.

(in)frequent contacts

2005-09-11T14:00:00.000-04:00

I've moved all of my msn contacts out of my "frequent contacts" group cause no one talks to me that much.

I no longer hate Phil's. Perhaps this is because last night they played "Last Night" and "Maps." Perhaps it's because of the people who were there last night. Perhaps it's because I found out that someone I don't know has a picture of me on their wall.

Last night was awesome. I met slash got to know slash hang out with some very cool people slash started a sweet band with Jim and Drew (with Alexandra on backing vocals and Sonal on cowbell, of which we inevitably need more). Drew said I'm better than he is at the guitar. I'm not sure that's true and I can't ask Jim because he agreed to be my yessman yesterday. They will be my new apprentices.

Turns out Fraser, Anthony and Bernard live right next to Matt Park and Alex, and also Jim, Drew and Keren not to mention Kristen and her friends. So I think I'm going to be spending a lot of my weekends bouncing around that bundle of student housing.

Investigation

2005-09-09T16:30:00.000-04:00

So, Amy insists that she did not vandalize my blog. That's good enough for me. Read Everything regrets the error.

In the meantime, a full investigation is underway. If anyone has any tips, let me know. I have a suspicion the crime took place in the WLUSP office... since that's where I blog and probably leave myself logged in. It reminds me of stories I heard about this guy who would use peoples' still open messenger accounts and lie to all of their friends. It probably wasn't that guy, and this is not so bad, but it happened in WLUSP. Hopefully I'll find out who it was by Saturday night at the Poet Tree.

Anyhow, although I have the location and the weapon, I lack any idea of the perpetrator. Kudos, you poetry hating bastard!

Vandalism!!!

2005-09-08T18:35:00.000-04:00

Someone has been messing with my poetry!

I went to update my poems link and someone (likely Amy) had changed it to a draft called "poetryfree"... very funny Amy. I'm removing your link from my blogroll and my kinja digest until you apologize or prove you didn't do it. And by the way, Greg Smith told me I should keep posting poems so here is an aptly named poem for you to "digest" while you think about what you did wrong (again, unless you didn't do it, in which case I regret the error.

Noble readers, join me in expressing your outrage over this invasion of my blog by attending the first annual "Poetry Hates Amy Rogers Reading" this Saturday at 8:00 at Wilfrid Laurier University by the picnic tables outside of the cafeteria.

... I have to go change my blogger password.

Swallowing Poetry

2005-09-08T18:30:00.000-04:00

I've torn pages out of books
got dirty looks
from old librarians
crackling with literary wit

like crumpled pages,
paid low wages and
called hags by those less
careful with language.

I swallowed Ginsberg's smutty
wisdom, Plath's bastard curse.
I've choked on Pound and carried
spines away in red wheelbarrows.

I ate each page
and shat essays
on form and content.
If only I'd been Marxist then...

I ate each page to save
poems from intellectuals, intent
on analyzing the letters of poets
to determine who ate well and who did not.

I acquire a taste for
every word, it's all I can hope for.
I'm no doctor; I cannot save them.
No banker either; I don't read Eliot.

As ink runs from the corners
of my mouth, I warn you:
Don't underestimate librarians.
They know their shit.

Tagteam

2005-09-05T02:30:00.000-04:00

Greg Smith has decided to join me in my letter-writing quest of goodness.

Also in the DaveAlexanderBlog news, Laurier Students' Public Interest Research Group has a new website, featuring me! Specifically, my announcement that we're showing The Corporation in BA110 on Wednesday night.

Then again, maybe wikipedia is a bit biased sometimes...

2005-09-04T13:30:00.000-04:00

US Chief Justice William Rehnquist just died.

This is taken from an article about him from my beloved Wikipedia

William Hubbs Rehnquist (October 1, 1924–September 3, 2005 was an American attorney, jurist, and political figure. He was a former law clerk for Justice Robert H. Jackson and an Assistant Attorney General during the administration of President Richard Nixon.

In 1972, Nixon appointed Rehnquist to the U.S. Supreme Court as an Associate Justice, and in 1986 he was elevated to the position of Chief Justice by Ronald Reagan. He presided over the court as Chief Justice for 19 years, making him the third longest-serving Chief Justice, after Melville Weston Fuller and John Marshall.

Rehnquist, a nazi, died in office in 2005 from complications of thyroid cancer, which he announced he had in October 2004. Rehnquist was the first justice to die while still an active member of the court since Chief Justice Fred M. Vinson died in 1953. The vacancy left by his death came just over two months after the announced retirement of Justice Sandra Day O'Connor, leaving the court with two vacancies (though O'Connor will remain on the bench until the confirmation of her successor).

Italics mine!

Also worth noting...

He voted against the expansion of school desegregation plans and the establishment of legalized abortions (dissenting in the 1973 case Roe v. Wade, 410 U.S. 113 (1973)) and in favor of school prayer, capital punishment and states' rights.

Rehnquist wrote the concurring opinion in the Supreme Court's 2000 decision on Bush v. Gore. And what an "opinion."
Leading up to the 2000 election, the Republican Governor of Florida (one Jeb Bush) initiated a major purge of voter lists, eliminating felons from these lists (and those who also happen to share similar names). These persons were disproportionately Democrats of African-American and Hispanic descent.
In addition

Critics argue that some voters in Palm Beach County might have accidentally voted for Reform Party candidate Pat Buchanan, when they thought they were voting for Al Gore, on a so-called "butterfly ballot". The Democrats are listed second in the left-hand column; but punching a hole in the second circle actually cast a vote for Buchanan, first listing in the right-hand column.

Finally ,

Some 179,855 ballots were not counted in the official tally. These were ballots which were mistakenly filled out, however, in some counties the voting machines (Accuvotes) would return the ballot and allow voters to try again, whereas in other counties the reject mechanisms were not enabled, thus giving voters only one chance to mark the ballot correctly. As a general trend, reject mechanisms were disabled disproportionately in counties with Democratic Party county leadership and African American and Hispanic populations.

The gist of the US Supreme Court's decision on the election was that despite all this, and despite a Florida Supreme Court ruling ordering more manual recounts, the Florida recount was unconstitutional (because it lacked clear standards) and should be stopped and G.W.Bush (who led in a computerized recount by only hundreds of votes), should be made President. Rehnquist and others worried that the recounts would do "irreprable harm" to "George Bush's reputation as the legitimate winner."

A long post to make up for my absence

2005-09-03T15:00:00.000-04:00

So, it's been a while. I should have written my review of the blog party by now, since it was my idea, but that was gonna take a long time, so I didn't.
         I thought about posting more poetry to keep you occupied, but Amy reminded me that not everyone likes poetry, so I didn't.
         I should also be using my blog to promote the events I'm planning for O-Week. Lucky for those seeking to read about my life, I am a shameless event-promoter, so I will, resentfully review the blog party as a means to an end.
         The best part about the blog party was that so many new people were there. At most of the parties I go to (RIP 37 Princess), me or Heather or Mike invite most of the people and so I know the people who show up pretty well usually. At this party, I met up with a mad slew of acquaintances and strangers and soccer pros. But I'm getting ahead of myself..
         So, a highlight reel in list form is probably the best way to do this (Warning: I remember things wrong!)

i)   The party began with me and Chris and Kristen, who was super cool. Then Amy showed up with balloons, so we blew them up. I think Corwin must have been early too. It felt like we were going to go to McDonalds for a birthday party thanks to all those balloons and that early-for-a-good-party or on-time-for-a-loser-party feeling.

ii)   Hoodie (can't find your blog...) showed up and we climbed some trees so we could hide Chris's awful movies. Also, we set up an obstacle course that I hope was never used because people were very intoxicated. (I was very intoxicated.)

iii)   My exgirlfriends showed up. They were a blast. Unfortunately, it's hard to pick up girls when you hang out with your exes a lot... who knew? I took some pictures on Nicki's camera that I thought were amazing at the time...

iv)   The lowpoint of the night was when someone ran off with the Star Trek poster Corwin and I were pining for. We still don't know who it was.

v)   Also adding to the birthday party feel, we played a game where you had to... well, who cares?

vi)   Random Internet Dave was there. I think the reason he should be called this is because he's not really a person, but rather some sort of blog meme.

vii)   Brandon showed up eventually. That was cool. Other Cordies such as Blair and Carly were there. I like Cordies. I probably talked to them more than I remember. I was drunk. But not as drunk as last time I drank with the Cordies.

viii)   On the porch, Laura took a photo of my invisible pink unicorn tattoo. The only reason she did so was because we were trying to see it in the dark, and thought the flash would help. It's henna. Incidentally, the picture proves that the invisible pink unicorn is both pink and invisible at the same time. Also on the porch, I took a photo of sra's, um, drink.

ix)   The highlight of the night was the soccer match we played near the end of the night. My team, which consisted of myself, Chris Clemens and the charming Shirley and Tanya, put up a valiant fight, but somehow we lost to Brandon, Hoodie, Kristen and someone else I can't remember at the moment. Which sucks cause we were winning when we outnumbered them 4-3. I think we should start a houseleague team next year. (PS Tanya, I love your blog!)

x)   Pizza on Nicki's porch with Morris, Laura and Corwin was the next thing to be photographed.

Thankses:

         Chris, for the party, beer, some cds (including Martin Tielli!) and an old fantasy book I lent to someone in grade ten and never got back!
         Mike, for hanging out for your last week in town. It was a good way to end the summer.
         Amy, for helping to plan the party and for beer.
         Corwin, for being early and keeping me entertained. Also, for knowing what it's called when Klingon's do battle for honour.
         Nicki, for the use of your camera.
         Laura, for taking such awesome goodbye photos.
         Regan, for beer.
         My soccer teammates. We played a great game and I can't think of a better way to bid farewell to Chris. I think if we start a soccer team, as I've suggested, we should call our team "AboutSoccer" in his honour.

On the streetcar

2005-08-23T18:45:00.000-04:00

head rests on shoulder
looks like love from two seats back

his shoulder is bone
she will sleep when they get home

streetlights shine brighter than stars

& I thought blogging was meticulous

2005-08-18T23:45:00.000-04:00

Roaming

Photos developed
with my friends in New Hamburg
I love their warm tones.

(Photo above taken by Martin)

PS, go look at my photos here.

Haiku Night in Canada

2005-08-16T16:30:00.000-04:00

My dad flails his arms
and curses blind referees
as the Leafs fall down.

Composed for Geist Magazine with help from Amy, Heidi, Sean and Greg.

Another day, another blog

2005-08-09T02:30:00.000-04:00

So we set up this sweet blog to coordinate random acts of community adventure. Check it out, and if you want me to invite you to be a contributor, let me know by leaving a comment there.

It takes an idiot

2005-08-03T13:45:00.000-04:00

         Republican Senator Rick Santorum has a new book called It Takes a Family. As a result, he's been on TV a lot spreading "family values" such as the superiority of heterosexual parenting, the value of stay-at-home moms, states' "rights" to ban birth-control and other closeted bigotry.
         In this interview, Santorum alludes to "radical feminists" who believe that women can only be successful through their work (and not as moms). He suggests that these radical feminists don't respect stay-at-home-mothers. He cites Gloria Steinem and the elites in academia and the media, but offers no specific exapmles of how or when this disrespect has occured.
         On the other hand, if Gloria Steinem is a radical feminist -- as she admits she is -- then shouldn't we all be radical feminists?
         Be thankful that most Canadians don't buy into this Americunservative rhetoric.

Dear Everyone,

2005-08-02T20:00:00.000-04:00

         In honour of the fact that enjoyed no tacos this Tuesday, I would like to call to your attention an urgent political action I took last week when I wrote an open (and yet undelivered) letter to Ethel's, the bar that hosts Taco Tuesday in Waterloo each week.
         Also, I wrote a poem about life.
         If only you people would read my other blog (and add it to your friends feed) I wouldn't have to post this filler.
         Also, my blog is third on the Australian msn search for "pictures of emo boys who kiss" which is a departure from my usual appearance on searches for "same-sex marriage poems." Due to my newfound fame, I will release an album entitled Kiss First, Ask Questions Later. As promised, this photo will appear on the cover. Same-sex marriage poems will appear as an insert.

Yours,

Dave

Wear your new badges with pride

2005-07-29T17:30:00.000-04:00

         When I was in Cubs I tried to get as many badges as I could. This meant my mom helped me grow plants, bake things and learn to sew. I got a music badge for playing the cello. If there were a laundry badge, I would have earned that one too since my mom had my brother and I doing laundry as soon as we were tall enough to reach the laundry detergent (Interestingly, a lot of Cub badges involve "domestic" skills that are typically seen as "feminine").
         While some of those skills still seem useful, I can't remember anything about astronomy or how to grow tomatoes. I have a tendancy to learn things for tests and then forget them. But I think I remember some useful stuff about tying knots, canoeing and starting fires. In Scouts, I didn't get many badges, but I did a lot of hiking. Endurance is a trait, not a skill.
         Not sure what this has to do with my new flickr badge, but I wanted to point it out to y'all. It's on the left.

Yee haw!

2005-07-26T15:15:00.000-04:00

I will not be blogging about my trip to Winnipeg or the Hillside Festival except to say tht=at the D.Rangers are a band from Winnipeg that played at Hillside and caused me to do-si-do and yeehaw at the top of my lungs.

Just thought I'd let you know that.

I did write at least one poem while I was gone.

Principles of Satire

2005-07-16T16:30:00.000-04:00

Worried about the potential for beiing sued for slander and libel because of our still underdeveloped TimBitter campaign, Sean, Amy and I had approximately this conversation:

Dave: What makes something libel?

Sean: Well it has to be defamatory, false and not satire.

Dave: Hmm... it's probably all going to be defamatory... what about slander?

Sean: Libel is written, slander is spoken.

Dave: I wonder if our play was slanderous...

Sean: Does anyone wear a cape?

Amy: Yes.

Sean: Then it's satire.

Sean Geobey knows pretty much everything (including much about South American political movements). He is rumoured to be considering the role of the caped Cofee Baron in the play's next performance.

Spectre of Tim Hortons

2005-07-16T02:00:00.000-04:00

In one of life's little postmodern ironies, the actor who played Karl Marx in our play about Tim Hortons is now working the night shift at Tim Hortons.

Stay tuned for this site that Tudor is currently helping us set up.

Also, Amy is trying to organize another run of It's something you can depend on in September / Waterloo Park. Maybe.

The Master Quiz: Gain

2005-07-13T12:30:00.000-04:00

You find a blank check, fully endorsed by a high-ranking executive at Microsoft and completely redeemable, lying on the sidewalk. An obviously needy street person snatches it and runs away. What do you do?

Borrelli:   I, Dave Alexander, robin hood of Ontario, would allow the impoverished wretch to keep the cheque. The bourgeois Microsoft executive won't miss his ill-gained riches.
         Uncle Karl, of course, teaches us that there must be a vanguard to lead the proletariat to victory over the capitalist class, and this poor pickles-and-feet-smelling man could now have mobilized the appropriate capital and resources to begin the revolution. Think about it. Seriously. What better way to lead the urban underclass than by crowning a new king of the bums! However we must be careful not to create a cult of personality around the bum, because we have seen the problems that those type of personality-led regimes have caused to the perception of leftism in the world.
         Speaking of leftism, GregSmith, Craig, and I took really good pictures the other day on our NDP cards. It only cost us 15$ with Greg's 1500$ camera, and then we went to Kinkos in Craig Radcliffe's SUV because it was the closest place. That unionized print shop was two blocks down, and Greg really wanted an ice cream cone first, so we stopped and got one first before heading to Kinkos. But the batteries on my mp3 player ran out so I went to HMV to buy a few new discs by those obscure Canadian indie bands that you've never heard of, and a new CD player to listen to 'em on. Those reusable lithium batteries were really expensive so I got the throw away kind, which I totally know is bad for the environment, but c'mon, I'm a student, remember?
         The pictures, though, look awesome. We went and looked at them all day in the WLUSP office, surfing the net for new stuff at tigerdirect. It was cool. Actually, come to think of it, I could use that blank cheque to get those Constantines tickets I wanted. Or maybe a new ill-fitting t-shirt. Yeah. That's what the bum should do...

Dave:   I would run after the person and try to explain to them why they should cash the cheque and donate half the money to the NDP. I would probably fail because I'm longwinded and my opinions are not very well-researched.

Happiness is subjective and often very complex. An ultra-swishy, Robin Williams type genie offers you guaranteed True Love, Financial Success or Fame - but the catch is that when you pick one, you will never find either of the other two in your lifespan. Which, if any, type of happiness do you ask for?

Borrelli:   First of all, just because the genie is sort of "ho-mo-sexual" doesn't mean I am. Secondly, I definitely want love. TRUE love. The kind of love that Death Cab and DashConf sing about. Or maybe the REALLY true kind that Hindsight's 20/20 write about. Their new album got an 8.3 on Pitchfork. Fame and Financial success are no big deal when you've got love. Love love love. You know. The kind that makes your knees quake, and your eyes drip that clear salty liquid (what is that stuff, by the way? It's always coming out!).
         In fact, I should write a poem about it, love that is. Even the gay kind. It'd go a bit like this:

When I see your Banana-smile from across the Room
My pants get all wiggly
Cus no one else says my name
The way that your mouth does

Twice

Twice you said my name
It rang in my ears
I'm so glad I cut my hair
So I could hear it better

Your chest is big
Or maybe small
I don't really care
Because I love your soul
Even when you're mad at me
Or sad at me
Or bad at me

Badbadbadbad
Sadsadsadsad
Madmadmadmad

Let's not fight
Let's love.
Like the Genie Says
Let's love.

Dave: My temptation is to take the True Love. Although if I had Fame I could try to make the world a better place by performing at Live 8... wait, that would be almost completely useless.
The one reservation I have about the restriction on Fame and Financial Success is that it would ensure that I never get to be Leader of the NDP, which sucks, but would be worth it. Besides, I could still be a good not-famous activist-type person. Or a famous poet, because poets really can't be famous anyways.

The Master Quiz: Divinity

2005-07-12T13:15:00.000-04:00

If you were an all-powerful God required to choose a single tenet for your loyal worshippers to live by, what law would you pick?

Corwin:   Neither a borrower nor lender of tacos be.

Dave:   "Let them eat cake." Either that or "No War for Oil." Or maybe "Do (nice things) unto others..." My catch-all answer is "Alleviate the suffering of others." Which is Buddhist I think. The difference between me and a Buddhist is that I think the cake thing would be good too.

Centuries later, other Gods start moving in on your territory. How do you stop them from stealing the faith of your people? HINT: Cool lightning bolts from heaven might be a start.

Corwin:   I'd write a poem on my blog about how worshipping other deities hurtmy feelings and quietly guilt everyone into changing their ways but if anyone ever confronted me about it I'd totally deny that it bothered me.

Dave:   Let them eat cake too. But I might put drugs in their cake so that they seem crazy. I'd give a speech: "These gods are fuckin' nuts! People almost never follow really crazy religions, right?" Then I would tug on my holy godshirt.

The Master Quiz: Sex & Love

2005-07-12T00:45:00.000-04:00

Love is like having your insides renovated by tiny gnomes with pickaxes: True or False?

Amy:   True. You're one for liking a reason to be mopey and emo all the time, plus you're prone to complications.

Dave:   True, but after the renovations are done, it's really more like having your insides inhabited by mischevous pixies...

If your sex life had to be personified by two animals locked in mortal combat, which two battling beasts would best describe your experiences? Be honest: did you just pick two random animals or do your choices actually mean something?

Amy:   The choices for animals are somewhat obvious, but picked for meaning. One animal represents the clean animals from the Bible, the other a dirty one. Having never slept with you, I'm going on your personality alone, but I think you're a little clean with a dirty streak in general when it comes to life.
         The first animal I choose for you is a goat. You're not afraid to stand on your own away from the rest of the herd, and you're pretty docile. Wikipedia has this to say about you:

"Goats are extremely curious and intelligent. They are known for escaping their pens and getting into mischief. Goats are also widely known for their ability to climb trees, although the tree generally has to be on somewhat of an angle. They may also jump on parked automobiles."

I stress the mischief part. You also like to climb trees.
[Dave's note: It also says that "It is a stereotype that goats eat everything; this probably arises from the fact that they tend to chew (but not eat) almost anything."]
Your dirty animal is a bonobo. It's a pygmy chimp. According to wikipedia, it's a crazy sexual creature...

"Sexual intercourse plays a major role in Bonobo society, being used as a greeting, a means of conflict resolution and post-conflict reconciliation, and as favors traded by the females in exchange for food (see prostitution). Bonobos are the only non-human apes to have been observed engaging in all of the following sexual activities: tongue kissing, face-to-face vaginal intercourse, oral sex, genital rubbing between females, and "frottage" between males. This happens within the immediate family as well as outside of it. Bonobos do not form permanent relationships with partners."

Nuff said.

Dave: A (stupid) owl versus an evasive rabit. These animals aren't random, they're just not very well thought-out... which is also like my sex life.
Upon further research:

"Rabbits are often used as a symbol of fertility [...] The species' role as a prey animal also lends itself as a symbol of innocence as an animal that seems to wish harm on no one [...] It is also a common folklore archetype of the trickster who uses his cunning to outwit his enemies."

whereas

"Owls are traditionally associated with wisdom [...] In Japanese culture, the bird is a symbol of death and seeing one is considered a bad omen."

So maybe my sex life pits the innocent trickster against wisdom and bad omens.

Master Quiz Newlywed Game

2005-07-11T21:15:00.000-04:00

Chris Clemens has created a "Master Quiz," the purpose of which is to "fuck things up," a pursuit I strongly endorse.

In honour of the unhealthy obsession people seem to have with my life as tv show, I will be answering this quiz in the fashion of The Newlywed Game. So first, I will need help from the following people to answer specific sections of the Master Quiz for me (i.e., in the form of "Dave would say...").

Loss: Tudor
Gain: Borrelli
Sex & Love: Amy (has no blog)
Divinity: Corwin
Et Cetera: Regan

Please submit answers via email to david.r.alexander at gmail dot com. I will post your answers with my real answers as soon as possible. Do not post them as comments please!

PS. Please be gentle, I'm a delicate flower.

Pay attention to me

2005-07-11T00:30:00.000-04:00

Hey all, I know you're probably wondering where you can find a bunch of sexy pictures of me. Well search no further than the Dave Alexander flickr group. It's very exciting; I feel like I have my own paparazzi.

Also, since Tudor has not yet put a link to my letters blog on his friends page (aka the hub of my blogosphere), I present you with a link to the email of my dreams (inspired by Nicole's similarly named but dissimilarly themed post).

Radical Pragmatist

2005-07-07T01:00:00.000-04:00

It's always amused me that whenever I search for Tony Kushner, I find this interview with Mother Jones. Angels in America is my favourite movie(er, miniseries... okay, play) ever.

I really want to go to New York City and see a Kushner play, but he doesn't have anything on right now. I'd also like to go to The Church of Stop Shopping and a neato books/coffee/democracy place called Vox Pop that Sander Hicks appears to have founded. It would also be cool to see one of Hicks' plays performed too.

And I'd like to perform this play at the Laurier Fringe Festival next February. In the play, Laura Bush reads Dostoevsky to dead Iraqi children (in Heaven).

So who's up for a trip to New York at some point in the future?

Detective Flint goes to Toronto (Fringe Festival)

2005-07-06T15:30:00.000-04:00

So The Detective Flint Trilogy is on as part of the Toronto Fringe Festival! Go see it. Part one "Sticky Business" was performed at the Laurier Fringe Festival and I believe it got Five Stars from The Cord Weekly. That's impressive given the cynical nature of Cord writers. The performers go by the name of The Polecats Acting Company and they're funny.

Dear Everyone,

2005-07-05T20:00:00.000-04:00

I now have a second blog. This one is getting too crowded.

With love,

Dave

It depends on US

2005-07-05T00:30:00.000-04:00

"The political process is moving in parallel with the security process."

~ George W. Bush

Raising awareness about our responsibility to Africa

2005-07-04T19:00:00.000-04:00

Here are three things we (Canadians) can do to help Africans:

1.  Cut farm subsidies so that African farmers can compete in a fair global economy.

2.  Make drugs for HIV/AIDS and tuberculosis widely available to African countries at a low cost (Canada was supposed to lead the way in this endeavour).

3.  Do something about the tendency of first world corporations to exploit Africa.

      Fundamentally, I think that Live 8 was ineffective at raising awareness about these issues. Aside from maybe a week's worth of feature articles published by many newspapers, the event was largely reported as a concert.

      I also suspect that much of the debate surrounding Live 8 was over whether or not the concert was effective at raising awareness. The same thing usually happens with politics; more attention is given to tactics than to issues. Ironically, I am doing this right now.

      So you can blame the media for their bizarre fascination with fame and strategy or you can blame Geldof for not phrasing his message correctly. Luckily, people don't rely just on the media to make meaning out of things; people talk. So as a mobilization technique, the event may have done a lot of good:

1.  The people at the concerts probably learned about and/or became more committed to Africa's crisis.

2.  The media did obsess over the story of Live 8, which at least makes it seem relevent (plus the afore mentioned feature articles).

3.  It should have mobilized those already interested in the issues.

      While there probably were some people out there learning and taking informed opinions, this may be balanced out by the damage done by crappy journalism.

      All that said, go read what Gerald Caplan, Naomi Klein, or Itrath Syed and Derrick O'Keefe have to say about Africa's situation. Oh, and vote for the NDP.

      Concerts are nice, but I tend to think that a large-scale march on G8 capital(ist)s might have been more effective.

Absolutely Everything You Need to Know about Live 8

2005-07-02T17:30:00.000-04:00

It's taken the mainstream media a while, but today, The Globe and Mail finally produced an article that features "absolutely everything you need to know" about Live 8.

"There is only one entrance, at Bayview Drive, and ticket holders will not be allowed to re-enter," The Globe soberly informs its readers.

One city official wants people to remember that this concert is not just about watching a bunch of famous bands play and then going home. "Barrie is not just a stop along the highway," the official somberly reminds us.

But The Globe wants us to make sure we don't lose sight of what's important. "Concertgoers with children should arrange a meeting spot in case someone is separated from the group," they suggest.

I'm starting to think that cynical as she sounds, Antonia Zerbisias may be right:

I find it ironic that African-American singers are behind the whole "bling" thing -- and yet Africans have been used and abused in the diamond trade. How much bling acquired through deadly means will be worn by concert-goers?

Next time you enjoy a candy bar, ask yourself about the children who picked the cocoa beans and whether they were fairly treated -- or paid.

And let's not even get started on the oil business.

These are the issues the corporate media, which are mostly promoting the celebrity aspect of the concerts, won't be touching any time soon.

Anyhow, read her whole post and be sure to check out the neato interview the CBC's Jian Ghomeshi held with Antonia, Barenaked Ladies' Steven Page and Edg 102's Alan Cross, here, if you have time. And if you still need to know more about this issue (and you probably do), read this article written by Gerald Caplan.

Best T-Shirt Ever!!!

2005-06-30T13:00:00.000-04:00

     This is my new favourite shirt ever. It combines my political obsession with my emo-hipster tenderness; I hearby dub this shirt "emolitical." I must have it.

     Also they have this shirt, which reminded me of a recent soundbite I heard from Jack Layton on 680 News with regards to a recent protest regarding Blue Man Group's refusal to negotiate with any of the performance art unions in Toronto. I've doctored the photo accordingly:

"The Blue Man Group is making me blue, man."
     ~ Jack Layton, my hero

I fucking hate you guys

2005-06-29T10:30:00.000-04:00

You guys, listen to this song I just wrote.

I hate you guys
you guys are ass holes
especially Sherry
I hate her the most

(I do not hate these two and I apparently have an unhealthy bitterlove for Geobey)

Batman Returns... to Fight Corruption and Protect Municipal Infrastructure

2005-06-28T12:45:00.000-04:00

"As a man I can be destroyed, but as a symbol I can be something... terrifying."

         In Batman Begins, Gotham City is plagued by organized crime, a corrupt police force, unethical business leaders, and lawyers who are either for sale or afraid to tackle important cases. Like Toronto Mayor David Miller, Batman vows to end this corruption and make his city a secure and compassionate place to live.
         While Batman relies on his fighting skills to wallop the crooks of Gotham, he also relies on help from two incorruptable civil servants: childhood friend / crush / assistant district attourney Rachel Dawes and police Leiutenant Jim Gordon (for some reason Batman doesn't trust the Commissioner of Gotham Police; sound a bit familiar?).
         I know brooms are not as terriffying as bats, but a symbol is a symbol, and really, would you rather have a giant bat cleaning up your city, or a guy with a broom? I'm tempted to think that the guy dressed like a bat might not know much about public policy. Well, maybe he'd know how to deal with rodent problems, but the broom-wielder is better equipped to deal with litter. I digress
         I would also go so far as to say that David Miller is a super mayor. In fact, the other day, the Supermayor helped talk a man out of killing himself.
         Other interesting parallels: the key terror plot of Batman Begins involves a the protection of a the water supply from contamination; Miller is a strong advocate of affordable mass transitl; both Gotham and Toronto would seem to have a mental health / homelessness problem which can be traced back to the days of institutionalization.

This is Part Two of Batman Begins to Get Political

emodest mouse

2005-06-27T20:30:00.000-04:00

"Do you believe what you're saying?
                 Yeah right now, but not that often."
         Greg was the only one who arrived on time. He watched me climb a tree (it ended in tears). Mike saw someone in the tree, but didn't realize that it was I who threw leaves at him from above. Erika showed up quite late and kept getting sticks thrown at her.

"Did I want love? Did I need to know? Why does it
                 always feel like I'm caught in an undertow?"
         Mike said that indie rock has become emo (as shit) and I said like the new Modest Mouse album and Megan laughed at my uncertainty about this claim. She seems to have thought of this already.

"I
         think
                         we all know the words"
         Sean and Liam didn't know the words, but they liked Most Serene Republic. Liam laughed at the way they were dancing. This would later come back to haunt him.

"All these people drinking lover's spit,
                      sit around and
                                         clean their face with it."
         Broken Social Scene, in their first act of the concert, told me to kiss the boy standing next to me. I didn't want to kiss Sean, but I would have kissed Mike or Liam. It was Pride Week after all.

"It's time
             that we
                      grew old and did some shit"
         Greg keeps forgetting to answer my music tag. But he has plenty of time to take/post pictures of me and to wax politic about anything you can imagine. And that's not so bad.

"making it work
                          takes a little longer
          making it work
                                  takes a little time"
         Kevin Drew said that we didn't need to go to a stupid concert to know that the world is dying and he said not to have any faith in rock and roll. He's my hero.

"Well now the blow's been softened,
                                      since the ocean is our coffin."
         Going to concerts is like having sex. When you do it alone, you think about what it would be like with someone else there. But when someone else is involved, they don't always enjoy the same things as you (like this one time I didn't want to drink; it ended in tears). Usually, you know how to enjoy it better alone, but it's more exciting to share the experience with someone you care about.

"Park that call, drop that phone
                          sleep on the floor, dream about me"
         I do.

"Now you're all gone, got your make-up on and you're not coming back"
         It ended in tears.

"I'm gonna dance all Dance Hall
                          every day"
         They didn't play "Dance Hall," but when I walked back to our tree-side blanket, Mike, Megan, Alex and Liam were dancing like old yuppies I saw at a David Bowie concert once. I laughed at them -- especially Liam. I wish I'd taken photos.

"The good
                        times
                                       are
                                                  killing me."

        Listening to Modest Mouse alone at the end of the night was not as good as it should have been.
         In the line-up for the ferry, I told Mike that Broken Social Scene sounds more and more like U2 and Mike said that when he first heard them on the radio, he thought they were U2. I said "imagine if U2 were good again," and Mike laughed and said that was impossible. Sean

"Everything's
                                    gonna break!"

         Sean had some good advice for avoiding awkward situations at Hillside; he said I should drop to the ground cross-legged and write bad emoetry.
         Getting seven CDs for $100 seeemed like a good deal, but I've spent about a week's worth of my paycheck over the past two days. Thank goodness I had so much fun with my friends. If you could put a price on friendship, I'd be very broke. I love you guys.

Pun of the week

2005-06-24T02:09:00.000-04:00

"There's enough covering up as it is, especially over the bloody mess in Iraq and the flag-draped coffins that come back to the U.S."

~ Antonia Zerbisias on media (self)censorship

Batman Begins to Fight... Poverty?

2005-06-23T15:00:00.000-04:00

   It was as I watched the young Bruce Wayne riding the monorail with his wealthy father (on their way to an opera) when I began to doubt Batman's relevance as a hero. Was Batman just some rich vigilante, protecting the rich from the desperate criminals of an oppressed lower class?
         My thoughts on this question were interrupted at the mention of mass transit: "You see Bruce, not everyone is as lucky as us. That's why Wayne Industries has initiated a project to bring affordable mass transit to the less fortunate." [Note: this is not the exact quote from the movie... unless I have some super-subconscious memory power, which I probably don't.]
         That's right, Bruce Wayne's millionaire father uses his power as a wealthy man and CEO of a successful corporation to initiate a large scale construction project aimed at revitalising the economy and providing affordable transit for the less fortunate. John Maynard Keynes would really like this movie.
          But the highlight of the film was when the villain reveals that he knew of Bruce Wayne's father. His evil organization blames Thomas Wayne for preventing an earlier project to destroy Gotham City. But Tom Wayne was no superhero; he did not prevent a terrorist-style attack on Gotham. It seems that terrorist tactics would be too simple to meaningfully destroy a once great city. These tactics become necessary only because Thomas Wayne, a famous philanthropist, foils the organization's original plan to destroy Gotham using - wait for it - economics.

This is the first part in a series called "Batman Begins to Get Political"

Do we all just hum along?

2005-06-21T12:45:00.000-04:00

In a surprisingly Marxist Toronto Star column, James Travers argues that Live 8 does not go far enough in its demands of the G8 leaders and amounts to little more than humming along with the criticisms made by prominent rock stars:

Instead of tapping our toes to the music, we should be putting our foot down on a trading system that excludes poor farmers from rich markets and makes aid beggars of states whose low costs should make them tough competitors. Instead of humming along, we should be shouting for fairness in an economic order that delivers less in aid than it takes away in commerce.

This isn't some dusty, defty-lefty, bleeding heart socialist theory resurrected by Marx's few remaining disciples. The hardly radical World Bank says knocking down trade barriers and eliminating $280 billion in subsidies that mostly benefit corporate agribusiness would put some $100 billion U.S. annually into developing country pockets.

So what's $100 billion? Its about $20 billion more than those same wealthy, industrialized nations contribute annually in aid.

I'll just point out that while foreign aid would cost taxpayers billions, eliminating subsidies would actually save us billions of dollars. I'm not qualified to comment on the economic effects this would have on our farmers, but I'm sure that these pale in comparison to the much more pressing situation in Africa.

Yes, for those of you wondering, this is me covering Greg Smith.

Special Guest Blogger Paul Wells, Journalist & Blogmaster Extraordinaire

2005-06-17T12:30:00.000-04:00

The following really is written by Mr. Paul Wells and indicates six of his favourite songs at this time.

The question's impossible to begin to answer. So I'm just gonna hit Forward on my iTunes until I come up with six tunes that are worth talking about.

1.    41 Shots (American Skin), Bruce Springsteen: The police got very upset at Brooce for doing this song about the Amadou Diallo slaying, of course, but there's not a word of anti-cop rhetoric in it. It's about how dangerous it is to be black in a bad neighbourhood. And it's just a great *song.*

2.    Body and Soul. The version I landed on was recorded in 1993 by a too-obscure saxophonist named Steve Grossman, but every serious saxophonist has measured himself against this one: Lester Young, Coleman Hawkins, Sonny Rollins, Joe Lovano and a million others. A long song form with very distinct sections, so you hear the form clearly all the way through. Almost like a tiny suite. "My heart is sad and lonely/ For you I long, for you dear, only."

3.    Finale from Symphony No. 9 (From the New World), Antonin Dvorak. An ordinary Joe from Prague visits America and guesses at what's coming. We learned to play this movement in high school — pretty well, actually — and it still makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up when I hear it.

4.    Jump, Jive 'n Wail, Louis Prima: "Baby, baby, looks like it's gonna hail/ Baby baby, looks like it's gonna hail/ You better come inside and learn how to jive 'n wail."

5.    Barrett's Privateers, Stan Rogers: "I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold/ We'd fire no guns, shed no tears/ Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier/ The last of Barrett's privateers."

6.    Please Forgive Me, David Gray. I don't find anything else this guy does particularly interesting, but this is a great, great song. "Please forgive me if I act a little strange/ For I know not what I do/ Feels like lightning running through my veins/ Every time I look at you."

My day as a political blogger continues

2005-06-16T17:30:00.000-04:00

This from the Washington Post:

Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist said Thursday he doesn't regret using his standing as a doctor to question Terri Schiavo's diagnosis from afar during the intense national debate over whether to remove her feeding tube.

Frist said he accepted the results of Schiavo's autopsy released Wednesday, showing severe, irreversible brain damage. But he stood by his statements on the Senate floor last March, when he argued that on videotape Schiavo appeared to respond to her family and doctors.

"Would I do it over again? Yes, I would do it over again," the senator told reporters. Frist, R-Tenn., said he had only sought to make sure the most up-to-date testing was performed to determine whether Schiavo was truly in a persistent vegetative state, the diagnosis accepted by state courts.

The funny thing is that at first glance, it seemed to me like Frist was saying "Would I over do it again? Yes, I would over do it again." Oh Republicans... crazy enough to be scary, but stupid enough to be really really funny.

International Emergency / House of Losers

2005-06-16T14:15:00.000-04:00

Today I will be a political blogger...

i) Three-quarters (75%) of Canadians believe "HIV/AIDS is a worldwide epidemic best described as an international emergency" (up 15 percent from 60% in February 2004) according to this poll conducted on behalf of World Vision Canada. If we really believe this situation is an international emergency, then I have three questions:

1. Why didn't the media pay more attention to the results of this poll?
2. Why the fuck can't Canada meet it's 0.7% of GDP international aid target?
3. Why aren't we in the streets protesting right now?

In other news, one in four Canadians are completely clueless.

ii) In an article entitled "Sober Layton a rare winner in a House of losers," (free registration req'd) James Travers explains why I love Jack Layton:

He successfully bartered his party's few votes to advance its social and environmental priorities, his caucus is cohesive and the only force that can credibly claim it tried to make this minority government work.

Layton's use of wordplay is also impressive:

"We have to be more than a party of opposition," he says. "We have to be a party of proposition."

iii)    The Conservatives have issued an ultimatum concerning their two increasingly unpopular major policy positions. They will allow the NDP-Liberal budeget ammendment to pass quickly (i.e. without forcing the House to sit through many many speeches from Conservatives to already-decided MPs) in exchange for delaying the passage of the Same-Sex Marriage bill.
         With Stephen Harper's month-long tempertantrum over, and Peter MacKay as the new face of the party, you'd think the Conservatives might want to move on from these two issues (in fact, it seems like they are trying to get out of their budget ammendment opposition, through this new tactic).
         Now suppose you were the Liberals, and you were supportive of Same-Sex Marriage and of the investments in foreign aid, affordable housing, the environment, and post-secondary education that appear in the NDP budget ammendment. You might want to emphasize the strong Conservatives opposition to these policies that (theoretically) you think are good for the country. You might also benefit from allowing the Conservatives to continue their fillibuster / tempertantrum / spiral-into-irrelevence. But you won't do that, because you have employed strategists that make the Conservatives look reasonable. House of losers indeed.
         Who would have thought that honesty is the best public relations policy after all?

My life as Dawson's Creek

2005-06-15T20:00:00.000-04:00

Character I am most like (written by the person who tagged me):
Here it is, courtesy of Dan

Sorry, man, but you’re totally Dawson. I don’t know if it’s the hopeless romantic side of yours, the scatterbrained side, or the intellectual side, but the combination of all of these, like Dawson, makes you who you are. Like Dawson, you struggled with making choices, and like Dawson, the girl you had loved for a while is now your best friend. You’re also sometimes stuck in the past, but you’re able to come through when people need you, and you’re a great friend.

Character I'd like to punch: Dawson (ironic now that Dan's pegged me as him, I suppose)
Character I'd like to *kiss*: Joey
Character I'd like to marry: Jen
Favourite Dawson's Creek song: Evaporated - Ben Folds Five
(from Season 1, Episode 7)

* * *

I hereby tag three people in honour of the number of good(?) seasons of Dawson's Creek in existence. Do the thing above and tag three others. In addition, you may choose to chronicle your life as I have below. That's optional. But you have to do it by next Wednesday at eight o'clock.
         Dan is Pacey because he is the quintessential slacker; in case you haven't noticed, he does not often atttend his classes and he puts a lot of effort into just being friends with people. But Dan/Pacey always comes through when needed, like when he helped me with Blueprint or on numerous occassions when I've needed someone to talk to. He's also rather easy to argue with, which is a quality that some mistake for cockiness. Really, that's just his way of getting to know you.
         Anne-Marie is Jen because she is a kind, outgoing friend with a strange tendancy to be very honest to people. She may be a bit cynical, but most of the time, she's very fun to be around. Her living arrangements for next year with Josh closely mirror those of Jen and Jack... you guys will be living with AM's religious grandmother, right?
         Alexandra is Joey because, while she's quite shy sometimes, she's also really smart. Whereas Joey has a great love of painting, Alexandra loves to sing (and to knit for that matter). Finally, Alexandra is a warm, caring individual with a fiery temper that I have only witnessed on her blog / in character. Plus she's got that angst thing covered pretty well (and I would know!).

* * *

Dave's Dawson's Creek Storyline:

Season One (2000-2001)
         In Dave's last year of highschool, he spends most of his time with his best friend Jon. Jon and Dave struggle with the reality that Dave is still in school, while Jon is forced to work full-time in order to afford food and shelter. Dave begins dating a friend of his named Erika, but finds that his inexperience with girls mixes poorly with Erika's eccentric relationship habits. Friendships become strained as Dave prepares to go away to University.

Season Two (2001-2002)
         It's first year of university for Dave. He's in a new city and has entered into the Economics program at WLU which he finds awful. He plays guitar in his residence with his roommate Dan. He finds a new love interest in Heather Sweeney, an Archaeology student who lives in his residence. But their relationship is troubled by Dave's roommates who sell drugs and stay up late into the night right outside Dave's bedroom. Heather switches into English thanks to a life-changing Cultural Studies course. Dave decides to pursue his dream of becoming a poet and, thanks to pressure from Heather, switches into the English program at WLU where he learns about poetry from an inspirational teacher.

Season Three (2002-2003)
         Dave begins to really enjoy school in a way he had previously thought impossible. He meets an inspirational poet named Ryan Dodington and the two begin to talk about doing cool hippy stuff. On the home front, Dave moves into a townhouse where he and Heather become close friends with Nikki, a fourth-year business student. Dave and Heather fall in love with each other. The War in Iraq prompts Dave and others to establish a Peace Camp where individuals come to discuss the events taking place in Iraq. This leads to many new friendships being formed and many cold nights spent outside.

Season Four (2003-2004)
         In his third year, Dave begins to hate English. But he finds new hope that his Psychology classes will lead him to an enlightening and socially activist journey. In second term, he becomes a writer for the Cord Weekly and decides to run for the student's union Board of Directors, both of which are seen by some as futile. Relations with Heather begin to become strained as Dave is very busy with this other shit, but the couple make it through okay. He becomes friends with hippy scum Mike Borrelli, revolutionary knitter Alysia Wyville, nudist blogger Tudor Costache, and many many others.

Season Five (2004-2005)
         Season Five chronicles Dave and Heather's long breakup and their "last" year at Laurier. While old friends are gone, new ones emerge. Dan Hocking, a friend of Dave's brother from high school, decides to help Dave publish Blueprint Magzine. The magazine becomes a success and Dave collaborates with another friend from class to write and direct a play about Tim Horton's. The collaboration between Dave and Amy leads them to work with an eccentric cast and a performance that can only be described as brilliant. But after the play is finished, there is still the difficult challenge of passing classes. The season ends with a farewell to many precious friends and the breakup of Dave and Heather.

Memorable Dawson's Creek episodes of my life:

"Prom" (season one finale)
         It's prom time and although things start out well for Dave and Erika, trouble arises when they pick up Jon and his date. When the limo arrives at Courtney's house, she is still doing her hair and they're forced to wait around. Tension is high as they cram into Courtney's car instead of the limousine the others have already paid for. At prom, Erika ignores Dave, while Jon and Courtney get into a shouting match of epic proportions. No one escapes this one unscathed as friendships are put to the test, and for the most part, completely shattered.

"The Blackout" (season three finale)
         Dave and Heather are at Dave's dad's house when the power inexpicably goes out. But another power is put to work when Heather, Dave and his family are forced to entertain each other. The bonds of family and friendship shine through the darkness, and passion is reignited between Dave and Heather as they hold hands in the silent night and swim in the cool waters of Lake Ontario.

"The Roommate Switch" (season five finale)
         Soon after the demise of Dave and Heather's tumultuous relatioship, Dave finally acts (with Anthony's help) on his secret/obvious crush Nicole. A fling quickly (and recklessly) develops. Dave is troubled by Nicole's reluctance to persue a serious relationship, and when Heather moves in with Nicole, jealousy and insecurity become rampant. As in Sienfeld, everything that can go wrong does. Unlike Sienfeld, things never go back to the way they were.

* * *

Sorry for that, but my blog was emo-free for a whole week. And you can't just keep emo pent-up inside like that or things like this happen. Not to worry though, this Friday I'll be posting the six favourite songs of not-at-all-emo journalist Paul Wells.

The Secrets of Spam Revealed (and a Fart Joke)

2005-06-13T19:15:00.000-04:00

So I was going through my junk email the other day when I came to a revalation.

The majority of spam seems oriented towards tricking suckers like me into actually opening and reading these craptacular email messages:

"A message for you"
"Protect Your Pet for Flea and Tick Season"
"Get your degree online for $500"

So far the most compelling of these is "Homeland Security is Everyone's Job," which I've opened at least three times.

Yet there exists another class of junk email more powerful and frightening than any previously imagined:

"Wal-Mart Offer Confirmation"
"Win a free iPod mini from xyz.net"
"Win free McDonalds for a year"

These messages are aimed at regular folk skimming junk mail subject lines to make sure nothing good ends up in the trash.

So my theory is that Wal-Mart, iPod, MacDonalds et al., may have already begun projects to fill our mindspace (read: junk mail) with their brand names. Perhaps, they seek to remind us that we still need that iPod mini, and would like to eat at McDonalds, if not for a year, for dinner maybe. Clever + annoying + socially irresponsible = Brilliant Marketing Campaign (see Hicks, Sander).

Also interesting,

Morris sent Erin a fart bomb in the (real) mail. Unfortunately, it went off at the post office. So Canada Post sent it back to him with... wait for it... an apology letter!!! Unfortunately, Mike threw it away because "it was wet and full of the fart bomb dust."

They'd better be sorry, because if the next one doesn't get through to Erin we might place an official complaint.

The six greatest songs of all time... for now

2005-06-10T18:00:00.000-04:00

         I come before you today with an epic task. I have been asked to consider all the great musical works of our time. I have been asked to listen to each song, openly and decide from among them, which are truly great. I have been asked to list my "current six favorite songs, then pick six other people that have to do the same." It is a great honour.
         I know you are grateful that I have been asked to do this. But there is no need to thank me. Your thanks belong to Alexandra, who tagged me.

   1. Content Was Always My Favourite Colour (mp3)- The Most Serene Republic
   2. I was born a unicorn (video) - The Unicorns
   3. Fireworks - The Tragically Hip
   4. Arcade Fire - No Cars Go
   5. Imagine This (mp3) - Wax Audio (Have you ever wondered what it would be like if George W. Bush sang a protest song?)
   6. Moon River - Kid Koala (This will probably never be released since Kid Koala is no way permitted to use this song, but I assure you it is truly wonderful)

I hereby tag the following people:
         First, since I feel that he has not been busy enough, and because he has not put enough attention into his blog, I tag Dan
         Second, I'd like to know what Alysia Wyville is listening to and if she's coming to Hillside.
         Third, I demand a list from Greg Greg since he hasn't blogged in too long. Since I can only tag six people, I hope Greg will tag some of our other friends.
         Fourth, I also tag Brad over in Brantford, in the name of better Waterloo-Brantford blog relations ;)
         Fifth, I choose to tag my blogless brother.
         Finally, in honour of my newfound (and perhaps illegitimate) place on BlogsCanada's political index I tag Paul Wells, mostly because it'd be cool if he read my blog. My "journalism" can be found here.

Enough links here for y'all?

Leia's Emo... or is she?

2005-06-08T19:30:00.000-04:00

I noticed Chris Clemens' msname was leia's emo, so I messaged him: "that so cool." I suggested it would be a good name for an emo band or a blog post.

leia's emo says:
   maybe Leia's Emo could open for Alexisonfire
Dalevixander says:
   yeah...
leia's emo says:
   and the hipsters could cry along to the lilting strains of punk rock guitar

   But then I began to think, Leia is nowhere near as emo as Luke. And she's much too interested in politics to be emo, despite the fact that she's "whiny as FUCK." But she's not a flake, she's a doer, not a whiner. So I've compiled this hipster guide to Star Wars.

Princess Leia
PUNK

Qualifications:
         Unlike Luke, Leia is in the rebellion because of the Empire's oppression of the third worlds. While Leia's planet had "no weapons" she knew where to get those x-wings and y-wings when they needed to take out the death star. Being arrested also adds to her punk cred. Of course she has had to deal with criticism that she's really just an aristocratic politico, Leia proves her punk cred by offing Jabba and then a musical experimentation with FOLK music (FOLK, as you may know, was the original PUNK).

Luke Skywalker
EMO

Qualifications:
         Luke is a dreamer. In A New Hope, he's whisked away from the farmlife because of a flaky spiritual journey. Luke really only gets involved in the Rebellion because it might score him points with the girl he likes... who ends up being his sister, which is not so bad, since that's what most EMO relationships are probably like anyways. Fortunately, Obi-Wan introduced him to Figrin D'an and his Cantina Band and by the end of the trilogy he's mastered a Buddhist-like religion and is fighting to free the galaxy from suffering... kinda like the Beasty Boys. Of course, part of freeing the galaxy from suffering involves freeing the galaxy from suffering induced by/through EMO.

Obi Wan Kenobi
JAZZ

Qualifications:
         Obi Wan is just that cool.

Han Solo
ROCK STAR

Qualifications:
         Despite his cocky Mick Jagger attitude ("Aye dont haveta fuck-ing help you if aye doent wanna"), Han comes around and is able to draw a crowd to the charity concerts that Leia holds to bring attention third world debt-relief. Like Leia, he settles down later in life, which is a) good for the Rebellion and b) bad for his music.

Chewbacca
INDIE

Qualifications:
Chris offered this exchange as justification...

Han: Chewy your music is fucking unlistenable
Chewbacca: *ROAR*
Han: No chewy, you are NOT redefining the boundaries of rock

R2D2
???

Qualifications:
Droids dig Kid Koala because he understands their struggle.

Darth Vader
METALHEAD

Qualifications:
As Chris suggested, METAL is "menacing and deadly, but in a I-cant-take-you-and-your-metal-mask-seriously kinda way." Vader is like Metallica. He started out as an angsty teenager, and by the time A New Hope rolls around, he's really just evil by habit. Although I have to admit, Vader's METAL is far more interesting than the music from Anakin's NuMETAL days (thanks Corwin).

Yoda
CLASSICAL MUSIC SNOB

Qualifications:
Here's Yoda talking to Luke about music...

Yoda: How can you grow strong listening to music like this? Bad poetry. Heh. Square glasses. Heh. A Jedi craves not these things. You are eeee-mowe. EMO leads to moping. Moping leads to whining. Whining leads to suffering. Don't give in to EMO.
Luke: But master Yohdah-
Yoda: No! Whine not. Do or do not. There is no [point whining about girls]

Yoda also disses METAL...

Yoda: Beware of METAL. Poor hearing is the first step along the path to the dark side of the Force.

He compares music to a Force that moves through all of us...

Yoda: You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship.

Although he prefers classical or jazz music, Yoda can hear the good in everything, even the ROCK.

Spiderman's relationship strategy

2005-06-08T01:30:00.000-04:00

Watched Spiderman on TBS tonight and fell in love with Mary Jane, I can't resist even a badly written love story--Peter Parker was so happy to finally kiss her. Morris said she looked like Nicole and I said "It's probably best not to dwell on it." He said "if you wanna dwell on it, dwell on it."

By the end of the movie we were screaming at Peter Parker not to say "I love you" because she'd say something like "um... okay..." then look around awkwardly. When MJ said she loved Peter, we thought he would smile and say it back--but he didn't, the clever bastard! He left her hanging.

To summarize what we've learned from this experience:
1) Get superpowers that will allow you to save her from danger at least three times (saving her will seem romantic even if it means that you were suspiciously following her around)
2) Work out more (unless superpowers include super-strength)
3) Slow motion is only one of the many editing tools misused by the director of this movie
4) With great power comes great responsibility (such as the responsibility to use as many cliches as possible)
5) Don't let her know how much you like her; don't tell her any of your secrets, even those she may already know

Comparison of tick removal methods

2005-06-03T22:30:00.000-04:00

When you put a bunch of depressing CDs on shuffle, it should come as no surprise that your CD player chooses only songs that remind you of the people you miss the most. This is not improbable; the odds of playing each song is the same and you used a lot of these ones on mixtapes. The worst songs are the ones I can hear her sing softly to me. I hold stars partially responsible. They may be more depressing than even The Dears or the music I used to listen to in high school (i.e., Matt Good, Our Lady Peace, etcetera).
***
My dogs have ticks. It's really creepy. The one I found felt kind of like a boyle; I thought it was gum caught in Casey's hair. Then my mom asked if it was a tick. Apparently they burst and blood goes everywhere and then they spawn like that or something. That didn't happen yet, but I'm really worried it could. We've quaranteened my dog until the vet opens tomorrow.
***
I miss my friends from high school. Since I've become single again, I feel a lot like I did then. Which makes me want to call my other ex-girlfriend, although I'm pretty terrified of doing so. Or I might just be anxious at the thought of ticks.

Free concert in London featuring U2, Rolling Stones, Maddona, Sir Paul McCartney; Spice Girls may Reunite; CBC misses the point entirely.

2005-05-31T23:45:00.000-04:00

Approximately 10:03 AM, CBC Newsworld

Alison Smith (Newscaster/Anchor on CBC News Morning): The man behind Live Aid plans to recreate his world famous charity concert. This morning Bob Geldof announced a new concert called Live Eight. Instead of raising money, this not-for-profit venture is designed to raise awaereness. Geldof says he hopes it will pressure the world's richest nations to cancel debt in the developing world.

Bob Geldof (in a dark blazer, his crazy awesome hair as wild as the passion in his eyes): No individual is ever going to solve the disgrace that is happening in Africa, the sole continent that in twenty years has gone into economic decline by a factor of twenty-five percent, and the result of that of course is that we see people dying on our television screens every night seemingly forever. So this is to finally, as much as we can, put a stop to that... So it seemed to me, that we could gather together again but this time not for charity, but for political justice.

Alison Smith (visibly excited: Well, following this is the CBC's Ann MacMillan who's in uh London this morning. So Ann, what more can you tell us about this concert?

Ann MacMillan (a motherly woman, dressed in pink, completely incapable of saying Coldplay, Puff Daddy, Snoop, or even Gee Eight without seeming utterly uncool): Well it's gonna be the music event, Alison, of the, uh, year, if not the decade and uh it's gonna be held in five different cities. London, the concert will be held on July the second, four days before the Gee Eight, hence the name Live Eight, starts in Edinborough, er, sorry, Glen Eagles up in Scotland. But the names of the groups are just superb, I'm gonna, I'm just gonna give you a little list here-

Alison Smith: mhmm

Ann Macmillan: cause I've just been watching the press conference, and, uh, Bob Geldoff announced some of the acts that are gonna be performing in High Park in London: U2, The Rolling Stones, Sir Paul McCartney, Cold play, Maddona, Sting, The Spice Girls might reunite apparently for the occasion, Annie Lennox, Snoop, R E M. There's also gonna be a concert in Philadelphia in the, uh, Museum of Art. Canadian Sarah McLaughlin will be singing there along with Stevie Wonder, Puff Daddie, Will Smith and El Divo. There'll be a concert in Germany at which Crosby, Stills and Nash will play, along with Brian Wilson, the old Beach Boy. Uh, Paris: Andrea Boccelli. Rome, where it's going to be held in the old Circus Maximus right in the ol Roman Forum that should be something Irene Grandy and Duran Duran. So it's going to be a mega group of concerts.

Alison Smith: No kidding (laughs). So presumably they want, ah, mega crowds at these concerts so um how is all of that going to be handled?

Ann MacMillan: Well, as you said, Bob Geldoff does not want to make money on this, he wants to raise consciousness about getting rid of debt to developing countries, so he has announced that all these concerts are gonna be free, nobody's gonna pay a thing, and in Britain there's going to be, you're gonna be able to text your message wanting a ticket in on June the sixth, and I hate to think what's going to happen to the telephone systems on that day in this country, but, uh, yeah, it's going to be, just, a lottery basically, you'll find, if you're lucky you'll get a ticket...

Postscript
Good work Bob Geldof, you've really got them talking about, um - who's playing at those free concerts again?